


Somewhere Between Pride and Sorrow

by Niedosytnix



Series: Pride and Sorrow and Everything Between [1]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Sex, Ar Lasa Mala Revas, Dirty Talk, Double Penetration, F/M, Fluff and Smut, I'm Sorry, Knotting, Masturbation, Mating Bond, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Multiple Orgasms, Nightmares, Oral Sex, POV Multiple, Porn, Possessive Behavior, Shameless Smut, Threesome - F/M/M, Voyeurism, admittedly terrible dirty talk at that, fixing problems with dick, maybe plot probably not, slight angst, so much elven glory, someone catches feelings, someone is a bit manipulative, someone is bad at sharing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-20
Updated: 2016-08-12
Packaged: 2018-06-09 10:12:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 28,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6901732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Niedosytnix/pseuds/Niedosytnix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which taking the Vir'abelasan had unforeseen consequences.</p><p>'ware the tags.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It rose with the sun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not really part of my canon works, 'Revas' purely because I have a weird aversion to Ellana. Though I guess I could say this is them if most of my head-canon never happened. 
> 
> Might add more smutty tags, probably won't get much more depraved than it already is.
> 
> Don't let the beginning fool you, it's a bit of a slow build to the end of the chapter.

She was trapped. Pinned between Pride and Sorrow. The captor at her back was almost impossibly respectful of her predicament despite his participation. Hands steadfast, gripping only her hips, steadily rocking her back and forth. His face pressed against her neck, the slow panting breath the only indication of his desire. Well, not the only indication.

The captor at her front mapped her form freely with his hands as surely as his mouth mapped hers. He greedily sucked in her moans and she could do nothing to keep them from him. Yet even if their hands fell away, she would not escape this.

She was locked to them both and she was in heat.

* * *

It had been an unassuming day. Another monotonous rotation of waking, duty, training, and sleeping was all that lay in store for her. The entire Inquisition followed a similar routine, waiting for their enemy to make his next move. Though they found meaning in their preparation- She found no such pleasure. Ill-suited to command, tired of all that had been asked of her, tired of losing herself along the way, exhausted with the constant threat on her life. She wanted it done, over with, no matter the outcome. She wished to disappear back into the wilds should she survive. Though there was no clan to welcome her home, no. That had been her failure, and few seemed to care for her loss. Her clan was now whispers of the forgotten sorrow, voices on the edge of hearing until called upon. She'd reluctantly accepted the burden of the Well of Sorrows, and with it apparently the man named Sorrow. She had thought taking the well would set him free, yet he lingered. She wondered if she managed to live past all this if he would still persist in following her. Not that she'd worked up the nerve to ask him, constantly defeated by that piercing golden gaze of his. That is, whenever she actually caught him alone. The statue of a man was often in the company of Solas these days, the two of them thick as thieves. She did her best to avoid them.

Yet as the sun rose to warm the glacial valley, an undefinable warmth rose in her as well. It was vaguely uncomfortable at first, and it made it difficult to maintain focus on the mountain of reports that always awaited her. If she was truthful though, the reports were terribly dry reading, and difficult to parse on the best of days. But by noon she was certain it was no small irritation. She was overheating- her skin hot to the touch, sweating, and it became difficult to even keep her own thoughts straight, a fog settled over her mind. The voices on the edge of hearing attempted to speak to her, but she couldn’t understand what they were saying. It must be some sickness, a fever... Yet it did not explain the persistent arousal that steadily grew more unbearable. She excused herself from the war room and was met with no protest. Surely she looked as ragged as she felt. Perhaps it would be best to sleep it off. She waved off the advisor's concern, retreating into the hall and hoping her dreams would not be the nightmares that so frequently plagued her rest.

She weakly pulled at the door to the great hall, and dizziness took her as the door swung in by some other effort. Strong hands steadied her. _Oh that touch_ , how long had it been since someone had touched her in even such a simple manner? The warmth in her core flared, and she couldn't stop the soft moan that left her. Her hands flew to her mouth too late to stop it. Mortified, she looked up to apologize to whoever had caught her. _Apology_ himself gazed back. His expression shifted, and if she had bet he couldn't possibly have managed a more serious look than normal- well, she would’ve just lost her wager miserably.

Pinned by that hardened gaze, she had not seen the man that stood at his right. No, she was far too consumed by the noticeable dilation of Abelas' eyes, black swallowing up the harsh glint of gold even as she watched. Only too late did the clearing of the other man's throat announce him, and she flushed further. Embarrassed by her weakness especially so in the combined scrutiny of their company. Solas was always so difficult to read and she could never tell if she managed to live up to the unknown standards by which he seemed to judge others. He seemed to respect her in his own odd way- yet he'd almost always been coldly distant with her. Abelas had made his own stance known the day they met. She was but a shadow to the ancient. The memory of his disdain had effectively kept her from asking all the questions that consumed her. Solas himself had been increasingly, infuriatingly subversive on the topics she wished to discuss of late. It had driven her to seek her own council, frequently hidden away in the underground study- the Vir'abelasan had answers they didn't. Though they weren't answers she found any comfort in. It left her feeling more lost than she ever had been, and it wasn’t something she wished them to see in her.

She straightened up, attempting to hide the tremor in her limbs, ignoring the bead of sweat that rolled down her neck, ignoring the strange scent that met her senses. It was subtle, intoxicating, and it seemed to be coming from them? It didn’t make sense. "Forgive me, I… I'm not feeling well, a fever. Excuse me." She moved to dart past them, yet they blocked her way, Abelas' hand still on her. "She doesn't know?"

Her brow furrowed. Solas sighed, "It seems she does not." Her scowl deepened, "Oh yes, continue to keep me in the dark! What don't I know now aside from damn well everything?!" She reeled, her hand grasping her temple in an attempt to steady the world, "I don't, sorry... I must get... bed. I don’t know what’s wrong with me."

The two men shared an infuriatingly silent look before Abelas swept her up, cradling her against his breastplate. _"Oh, oh no, no don't!"_ It was all the protest she had left, the sudden increase in the magnitude of touch drove her usual stubborn fight out of her. A surge of arousal flooded in to take its place. She buried her face in her hands as the scandalized whispers of professional gossip mongers met her ears. Great- that was the last thing she needed. 

By the time they reached the top of her stairs she was panting, and she hung upon the edge of an entirely different precipice. She made a last ditch bid for freedom, fidgeting against the arms that held her, being touched somehow, inexplicably, made it worse. Mercifully he let her go, and far away she heard the lock to her door click sharply. She paced away from the stairs, eager to put as much distance as she could between them as Solas strode in to sink down upon her couch as if he owned the damn thing. It felt like a trap was about to be sprung, perhaps they were somehow to blame for her sudden and perplexing illness.

“Revas, come here.”

“No- you, explain yourselves! What is this? What's happening to me?”

He sighed, appearing to weigh his words. "You feel feverish do you not? An unusual sensitivity to touch, a difficulty in remaining focused? I imagine there is now also the scent, maddening- alluring." He had the full range of her hindered attention. "I _yes_... How do you know?" He ignored her question barreling onwards with his own, "And the voices of the well have not explained it to you?" She shook her head, her agitation rising at his roundabout way of getting to the point. "There was a moment earlier, but I could not understand their words."

He nodded, finally giving up his pretense and speaking the words that stopped her cold. “Put simply you are experiencing heat. What you are feeling is the time in your cycle where you are most fertile- your body calls for a mate. It is _not_ a sickness.”

She stared at him in disbelief, not missing the condescension in his tone. “What- excuse me?! …You're kidding. _Please_ tell me this is a joke-” She amended, “A shitty one.” Tossing her hands up, she resumed pacing. “This is ridiculous! Heat? Mate? Last I checked I was an elf not a wolf.”

A pointed look met her words, “I wish it were that simple. It seems that taking the Vir’abelasan had an unintended side effect of sorts. It appears to have woken the innate magics in your body that have been lost to your people.”

She scowled at him, tired of his wording- _your people_. The very connotation carried a deeper disdain than even Abelas normally managed. She couldn't help the mad laugh that issued forth, and she couldn’t bring herself to care that the effort soon had her sinking to the floor, weak. “How is it that two elves who can barely even stand the sight of me, who won't even give me the time of day, have barricaded themselves in my room, only to so helpfully inform me that I'm what? Fertile and horny and that this was once normal?! Why? Why are you here?”

Solas donned a rare darkening look. Yet it was Abelas that answered. "You call for a mate. It is a call that requires an answer. It is a call that affects more than just you."

His voice carried a completely unexpected kindheartedness, yet his words were faintly disturbing. "You are here… against your will?"

"No, we are here for you."

She slumped sideways to the carpet, trying to process what he meant. Failing.

Footsteps, the slight clink of metal- a gauntlet divested. His bare hand met her cheek, gently smoothing the lines of worry she bore. It was almost too much to handle and it came with renewed embarrassment that such a small gesture could provoke such a telling whimper from her. He spoke low, in a tone devoid of the disdain she had expected.

"The first heat is chaotic, if not addressed soon- it may drive you to do something you would regret, or put you at the mercy of others."

"How- how do you even know that I am..."

"We can feel it. In time, if not addressed, eventually those of your kin would sense it as well- though they would not comprehend why. You would be pursued, and not kindly." He gently swept the hair from her eyes, tilting her face to meet his gaze. "Will you permit us to take care of you?"

“I don't have a choice do I?”

Solas snapped, "There is always a choice. You _may_ prefer the one we offer to the alternative." She glanced at the man, biting back on her retort. He was lacking the composure he normally bore, and though he leaned back with his usual vein of confidence it was bereft of his usual relaxation.

“Are there consequences?”

He leveled her with a dark look, "There are always consequences to our choices Revas. I warned you not to take the well."

She bristled, _ah so there it was_. "Yeah and you didn't want it either- what was I supposed to do?! Leave it to be corrupted? Let what lay within be lost? Let Morrigan take it?! When do we get to stop feeling guilty for losing ourselves Solas? When can we stop being obsessed with the past and live our lives for however long they are?!"

The flinch he didn't hide was almost gratifying. As his agitation waned to thoughtfulness she looked back to the man crouched beside her, now gently stroking her hair. He was all but a stranger to her, and a mystery... Yet, there was now a disarming kindness to him the other had been lacking of late. Solas finally answered more considerately, his voice quiet, "Yes, there are consequences. Should we assist you it will forge a bond of sorts. There is also a high risk of conception. I know of a tea that should be more than enough to prevent it. I will have it sent up. It will likely take several attempts to satisfy the call. If successful, your heat should only last a week."

 _“Oh...”_ Her breath hitched. A _week_... That wasn't at all what she had expected and the hope she had tended of getting this over with quick was dramatically extinguished. How was she supposed to be shut away for a week? She sighed, pressing her face more forcefully against the carpet as the world threatened to spin once more. "A bond? What sort of bond?"

Sorrow answered as he settled down, crossing his legs. “The Elvhen mated for life, though, not usually bound to a single mate as many of your kin prefer. The burden of one's heat was shared among many. Should we succeed, your next heat would call us, and only us.”

“Oh.” She fought the urge to ask them if this was some new twisted nightmare of hers, yet on the off-chance it wasn’t, it probably wouldn’t be sensible to offend them. After all, it wasn’t exactly the prospect of lying with them that bothered her. It was the worry that it was all a joke, some ruse to hurt her in some new perverse manner. She had never truly recovered from the Nightmare's domain, and questioning her reality had long since been an integral part of her day. They probably didn’t need to know that. “And you are both, ok with that?” Not that she was particularly sure _she_ was ok with that, any of it really. 

“As I said, the well woke the innate magics of our people. You are not entirely what you once were. As to what else Mythal’s gift has bestowed upon you- only time will tell.”

Her eyes widened as she turned her gaze back towards Solas. He looked deeply uncomfortable with what he just divulged. _Our people_ …? The voices of the well rose up in the clarity of her disbelief, confirming her dawning realization. She was one of _them_ , a sentinel? She had met the old woman guised as the goddess, the demonstration of her control… the knowing look in her eyes. She paled at the thought. Her fledgling service to Mythal had… changed her? That realization was soon dwarfed by the other- Abelas had counted Solas among _his_ kin. He seemed to catch the thoughts coming together in her mind as she stared in blatant shock.

“Yes,” he spoke quietly. “Now you know.”

It all made sense, the impossible things he knew. He had _lived_ them.

As her thoughts spiraled in their ever inward plummet, Abelas gathered her up, setting her in his lap, holding her against his breastplate. It wasn't strictly comfortable, yet it served better than the carpet to anchor her against the cruel tilt of the room. Though it quickly made in-depth analysis of every interaction she'd ever had with the prideful man impossible. The vibrant warmth in her core, the maddening scent that plagued her senses sent her weak with want. It was a cunning distraction.

She took a deep breath. "Yes. Help me, _please_."

 

Abelas carried her to the bath tucked away in the small room under the odd little balcony. He set her lightly on her feet, steadying her as he turned the tap to fill the large metal tub. She tried to hide the growing blush as he turned his attention to her clothing, deft hands undoing buttons and laces, peeling her sweat dampened garments from her skin. He waited for her quick nod of assent before unwinding her breast bindings, her hands automatically rising to cover herself. A soft noise of dissent left him, "Do not hide yourself. You have nothing to be ashamed of." The heavy rise and fall of his chest seemed to reinforce his words as much as the heat that adorned his cheekbones. She let him pull her hands away just as she allowed him to tug the soaked cloth of her smalls down her thighs. She braced herself on the edge of the tub, gripping the edge to keep from touching him. It was quickly becoming a challenge to keep her hands from wandering. She looked up at the approach of quiet steps to see that Solas had returned. A small satchel in his hands, a look of softened desire graced his features at the sight of her bared. It was an odd look on him, and not one she ever imagined to actually see there.

She had flirted with him at first, yet he had shown no interest beyond trading cunning compliments. He had politely turned down her attempts at moving beyond that, so she had reluctantly let it go, turning her attention inevitably towards Dorian. And though _he_ had flirted with her quite convincingly, she soon discovered he had no interest either. It stung, but she understood. She'd given up on finding affection after that, pouring her attention into her bitter duties, ignoring what eyes did look her way. Enduring alone, as she always had.

What they now offered seemed far too good to be true. She waited patiently for the punchline, though as each second dragged on it became less and less likely. The sound of metal settling on stone drew her attention. Her gasp flew forth unhindered to see Abelas stripping, unfastening the intricate clasps to his armored legs. His chest bare, no hood, no gauntlets. None of the walls he normally wore. He... wasn't bald either- the shock of silver was an unexpected surprise. The hood apparently hid a long silver braid that cut a swath down the center of his head, the sides shaved close.

Solas shut off the tap, a hand gently taking up hers, the simplicity of the touch all at once broke her of her gaze and tended her faintness. And as he helped her into the bath she wondered how she would ever handle more than that.

She watched, quietly sinking up to her chin as the two men shed their clothes. The tub was large enough for all three of them, yet not large enough that she could avoid being pressed up against them. As they bared themselves before her she tried to avert her gaze, yet her curiosity quickly made it an impossible task. They were quite well endowed, more so than any other elf she’d seen. Her pulse quickened. Her effort to center herself, to focus on staying calm largely failed as they slipped in on either side of her. Her mind lost to the haze in their close proximity, soaps and oils passed back and forth around her, hands caressing, gently scrubbing. Her last shred of focus spent on keeping her hands to herself, she couldn't stop the sounds she made, and she couldn't stop her sudden unaided release.

She cried out softly, biting down hard on her lip, her hands covering her face. The involuntary hitch of her hips sent the bath water into motion, small waves weaving outwards even as her arousal wove through them all. A quiet intake of breath echoed in the small room, soft gasps that sounded more than just two in number multiplied, propagating into a chorus of sighs. Quiet praise answered her echoing call, reassurance as she was held. She didn't come down and the heat only burned hotter.

“I'm sorry... I- I can't help it.”

“Shhh, it is okay Revas, do not fight it.”

 

She did not know at which point she'd been carried to bed. Only once they had left her side did she realize the balcony doors had been closed, warded against sound. The curtains drawn to darken her room, a myriad of candle lights flickering, casting a soft glow about them. She lay panting, writhing uncomfortably amid her sheets when hands lifted her up to sit. A warm cup pressed to her trembling hands. "Drink this Revas. This is the tea that will prevent it from taking root." She lifted the cup, drinking deep, coughing. It was bitter, and it burned going down. She coughed again slightly as another cup was pressed to her lips. It was sweet, honeyed and she was thankful it washed away the awful taste that had come from the first. She was maneuvered into Abelas' lap. The stiff press at her back startled her even as it ignited her. She quickly devolved into a mild panic, her breath racing as she began to hyperventilate, certain she was about to catch fire. A heated hand lay steady over her racing heart. "Slow your breath Revas, I know it is overwhelming, but you must stay calm." Abelas' carefully even tone pulled her back, and she tried to comply. 

Solas returned with the satchel, pulling small bottles from it, setting most of them aside. She watched through unfocused eyes until her gaze was drawn to his erection, startlingly hard. She couldn't look away, transfixed. Then as she noticed the slight bulge near the base- her interest no longer went unnoticed. "Men of this age no longer have it. It is perhaps one of many reasons I could not return your interest. You mentioned wolves- Are you familiar with such physiology?"

She nodded weakly, she had seen wolves in rut while on hunts with her clan. She hadn't thought... Not on a person... "Then it... Will... Uh…”

“Prevent us from withdrawing from you, yes."

She gasped, the edge of a whine as arms wound tight around her, another peak was imminent... She weakly fought Abelas' hold. A warm hand slid to her folds, the wetness already there surprising her- a finger slipped inside, then another stretching her, thrusting gently, and then she _shattered_. Each escalating cry that fell from her was louder than the last, immobilized, shuddering around the fingers within her. Panting breath filled her ears. Hands shifting her, fingers withdrawing, yet the high lingered. "Revas we cannot wait any longer- to do so would be... Unwise- if we are to remain in control of this." She gave a sharp desperate nod, "Will you permit us to take you in tandem?"

She gasped "At… at the same time?"

"Yes."

She had meant to ask how, meant to ask for clarification, what she said was _"Please-"_

One vial was oil. She was vaguely aware of it applied liberally to her tight ring and the man at her back. The other she wasn't sure of, more soothing, as it was applied to her folds, probing quickly within her.

And then they lifted her up, and Solas angled himself up against Abelas, his thighs draped over the other man's. Agonizingly slowly they brought her back down, holding her still as she felt the press against her entrances. One sweet, and one slightly stung. Soft words, incoherent to her ears, she fought to relax- hoping that's what they wished. Low groans as they entered. Slowly sinking down over them, her slickened skin slid between their heated forms. Sounds of pleasure she couldn't be sure weren't hers as they slowly filled her. Begging, pleading, her hips finally met theirs and she fell to pieces. Hands clutched at her, the press of lips, a chorus of moans. She lost herself in them, and they in her.

It didn't abate- the constant clench within her. She had slumped limply against Abelas' chest, his hands gripping her hips, keeping her still despite her persistent inward traitorous rebellion. Solas shifted with a groan, settling deeper within her, and it startled her eyes open. He was beautifully disheveled, eyes heavily veiled, a lip firmly captured between sharp teeth. The growing heat spreading across his features sought to outshine her own. Her eyes widened when she felt it, and he leaned in quick, capturing her mouth, anchoring her as the growing press within her threatened to divest her of her consciousness. Her sounds swallowed up as the growing knots within her filled her, stretching her wide around them. She fought to move, to moan, yet she was incapable of either captured as she was. And before long they were securely tied within her. Abelas moaned long and low at her ear, Solas broke off his kiss to bite at her lip. It was all at once too much and not enough.

Shaking words pressed against her lips in apology. "Revas, are you alright? Is this okay?" She whimpered her _“Yes”_ , and he groaned into her mouth. His hands caressed her form freely as a small kiss was pressed to the back of her neck. Abelas moved her. His hands at her hips gently rocking her against them both, the tug of their knots made short work of her. The man that was Pride pulled her forward and he _devoured_ her. The man that was Sorrow leaned in to pin her between them.

Her scream shattered them all. Her release tore through her with potency unmatched by all the came before. Filled as she was, locked to them her frantic hitch of hips accomplished little, save to quickly set off the two men who trapped her. Muscles tensed, hands gripped painfully, a groan, teeth at her neck. Arrhythmic thrusts upward, clashing and she felt the tight throb, the heat of the pulses that flowed forth. Her hands met the chiseled lines of a jaw, her lips met his. She consumed Pride, and he let her.

 

She gradually regained coherent thought. Their pulses within her slowed, the time between each wave grew longer. Abelas held her up against him. Solas had fallen back to the bed several waves ago, an arm thrown over his eyes as he panted through another pulse. The sight of him stretched out before her as at the mercy of her heat as she was, woke desires in her she didn't know she had. The heat lingered, yet she felt strangely sated for the time being, but no less sapped by what she had been through. Solas' absence at her front left her with the strange intimacy she maintained with Abelas. His touch had been nearly clinical at first, yet now... There was a care in his caress that convinced her to turn her head to look back at the man. The softness in his gaze hadn't been there before. Her gaze dropped to his lips, parted absently, his tongue caught between his teeth. His hand left her chest to tilt her chin up, coaxing her to return his stare. She hadn't expected the kiss. The soft press of his lips drew a moan from her, his tongue hesitant to rush between her parted lips. She met him halfway, leaning into him as best she could from their awkward angle.

In her preoccupation she hadn't been paying attention to the hand that slid to the bundle of nerves. A few soft strokes and he deftly unraveled her once more. His moan filled her as she clenched around them again, and far away she heard Solas echo the sound. His hips rolled and she bucked, causing Abelas to shudder. The strange web of cause and effect they maintained would have been fascinating if she could manage to focus for more than a few seconds. Solas weakly attempted to sit up, the failed movement setting off another chorus of moans. Abelas held her tight, gently breaking off his kiss, leaning them both forward, temporarily pinning her against Solas. With effort he managed to roll them all to the side. She lay snug between them, safe, arms wound around her, a face nuzzled into her neck as another pressed to her brow. She grasped one of Abelas’ hands, threaded her fingers through, winding her free arm around the back of Solas’ neck. Soft murmurs of praise, quiet moans filled her ears as they rocked into her, the position lending itself better to their effort. 

She smiled for the first time in weeks, reveling in the ridiculous tangle they made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, sometimes I have to set my depraved ideas free in order to get back to my regularly scheduled programming. 
> 
> Probably only two chapters, unless I have ideas- Mmmmaybe three.


	2. It changed them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with this.
> 
> Mostly Solas Pov.

It was endearing how she fretted, back to hiding behind her hands as they washed her. She had protested at first, but they had insisted on the effort, so she endured- resolutely pretending it wasn't happening. Her lingering embarrassment even after what they'd done brought a small smile to his face. It was a refreshing change from the memories of heats being used as political leverage, as weaponry, as punishment. The quiet simplicity of her, entirely without malice drew him in inexorably. He was suddenly glad he'd agreed to this, it would be a memory he would cherish.

It should have taken far more convincing from the other man to secure his participation. It had been ages since he’d felt such a call, the seductive tug at his senses. It was a small taste of what had been lost, and he couldn’t help but desire the reminder, even despite her choice that precipitated it. It deeply troubled him that one named for freedom would be willing to bind herself out of a misguided sense of duty, to a people so far removed from her own. Even to one such as Mythal, especially to one such as Mythal. The one who'd once begged him to take a form, the one who once marked him... He shook off the uncomfortable thought, returning his attention to the blushing woman that so easily sparked the desire in him he had once succeeded to hold at bay. Such attention would once have been deeply inappropriate... Now though, he wasn't so sure. She... changed things. That one such as her could so effortlessly regain something so lost to her people as heat... He wondered what else she may regain in time. 

He wondered a great many things as he quietly cared for her. The two of them had been watching her closely as she learned the truth from the wisdom of the well. He had taken great care to avoid shaping her opinions, and the questions she asked of him were telling. He had longed to answer her, longed to give her the wisdom she sought... Yet he needed to know- If a Dalish elf such as her could accept the truth on her own... There was hope she wouldn't be the only one.

"Revas."

Her reply came muffled from behind the barrier of her fingers. "Yes?"

He waited, quietly. Certain she would eventually drop her guard to face him. It took longer than he anticipated but she relented, her hands slowly receding as she tentatively met his gaze.

"How do you feel?"

"Tired, sore... _amazing_." She quickly retreated once more. A soft chuckle fell from his lips at the breathy awe with which she spoke. It was a good enough answer for all its brevity, one mercifully lacking the word pain. He hoped they could keep it that way.

He waited as Abelas finished his work, gently washing their efforts from her thighs. Both of them stilled at her soft moan. A shared look before the man resumed- while he stood to fetch the salve he had prepared. Her care would be important to prevent her heat from becoming a bitter, painful, memory. He heated the concoction with a slight spell as he sat at her side, soft words of warning before he applied a thin layer of it to her slit as well as the tight ring. Taking care to be as clinical as possible- she would need rest to recover before her heat drove her to want once more. Provocation would only make it surface sooner.

It had not taken her long to succumb to sleep after they settled down on either side of her, holding her close between them. Abelas lay wrapped around her back, an arm draped loosely over her, and he... Lay _face to face_ with her. She had determinedly not met his gaze but neither did she flinch away, even though they had foregone clothing. It would be unnecessary as she would likely wake with her need in the night. She instinctively curled against _his_ chest, nuzzling closer as his breath hitched, and for a moment he found it hard to breathe, her arm snaking around his back. The two of them lay deep in dreams while her unconscious efforts kept him wide awake. That she could relax against him, even after what he'd said... He sighed quietly, pressing his cheek to the top of her head, inhaling her scent. It was important that they maintain contact with her as often as possible even while not actively joined and her acceptance made it easier. Close proximity helped ensure a successful bond, and the success of the bond was crucial to end her heat as quickly as they could. It was perhaps another cruel testament of the world he'd woken to, that he could not prolong her heat, take her without haste. Yet, if Corypheus forced their hands while she was incapacitated... he sighed, no it was best to get it over with.

He lightly caressed the pale lines of her vallaslin, suddenly longing to see her truly bare. Servitude would not suit her. And though he had no wish to truly bind her... What they would forge would hold little sway over her- unless she wished it. As he listened to her soft snores he wondered if she would allow them to share her bed without the compulsion. He wondered if she would allow him the chance to make up what he’d missed by turning her down. She slept so soundly and with such focus, it was _fascinating_. He had avoided her dreams out of respect after she’d shared his dream of Haven- the dream in which she reached out and he turned away. A long sigh left him, it was unwise to hope for such things… and no answers would come while she slept. Her slow even breaths were parted by her soft sigh as he wound his arms tighter. Clinging to the soft innocence she retreated to in dreams, he sought the Fade with the memory of her lips on his.

 

The harsh jab of her elbow bloodying his nose shocked him awake. He quickly healed the slight break as Abelas woke to a forceful punch to the chest. It took their combined efforts to subdue her without sustaining further injury. It had been far too easy to forget that this small elf who bent the ears of nations, who lay whimpering between them just hours ago- carried formidable strength all on her own. The haze she had woken to presented an unanticipated challenge- She sobbed, "This isn’t real… _it can’t be real!_ Why can't I wake up?!" It wounded him further to hear it. How hurt could she be that not waking up alone constituted a nightmare? _How had he missed the signs?_ He had occasionally shared her tent in their travels out of necessity- yet never had she woken like _this_. He laid a hand to her cheek as she fought their restraint, attempting to ground her as he reached for her with reason.

"Revas, focus on me- you are not dreaming. You are in heat, and you are still safe with us. This is real."

The haze that veiled her eyes cleared slightly as she gazed at him with a disbelieving scrutiny, her eyes catching on the trail of blood from his nose. Her horrified look set him on edge, expecting her to devolve into further struggle, yet still she shocked him- Bursting into tears instead. Their hold on her loosened as she curled inward with her grief. A litany of broken apologies fell from her. He was adrift, suddenly without direction, unsure of how to dispel what plagued her. It set an uncomfortable edge of panic in him as the other man swept her up. He envied that Abelas did what he could not, soothing words whispered in her ear, hands that healed in long comforting strokes down her form. The man was intimately familiar with sorrow in a way he could never be, despite all the tragedies of his long life. His sorrow too quickly turned to pain, to determination, to regret. She calmed enough to put him at a tentative ease as he hastily cleaned the blood from his face.

"How long has this been going on?" She sniffed, rubbing absently at her eyes, "Since Adamant." He swore quietly, it had been months since that nightmare, nearly half a year, how had she kept this quiet? "Why didn't you say anything?" Her answer pained him profoundly, "No one seemed to care- I mean they _say_ they care… but it felt like they only say it because that’s what they were _supposed_ to say." She let loose a shaky breath. "I… My whole clan was wiped out, because _I_ made a mistake. I sent a diplomat- to someone who was supposed to be an _ally_... Everyone is always going on about words and faith and cooperation." He watched with growing unease as she shook, fisting her hands in the sheets as a fresh sob broke loose _"It was all a lie!_ My entire family- everyone I'd ever known... I- I can count on one hand the amount of people that _even mentioned it_ Solas. That… _hurt_. How could I show such weakness again? They expect better of me. I’m just... not good at living up to what they expect."

His soft intake of breath didn't escape her notice as she looked up at him, her eyes wide in pain. The reflection that surfaced there, in far more than just her tears that threatened to spill, looked uncomfortably like his. He had her all wrong. It wasn't that she didn't care- she cared a great deal... And the burden of it was silently killing her as surely as his anchor would if left untended. He threw caution to the side, pulling her close, raising walls of his own around her. "You could not have known what would happen, Revas. We cannot always anticipate what horrors may grow from our actions." She stifled a sob against his shoulder, and he did not relent in his grasp. "Do not concern yourself with their expectations, forget their words, forget the alliances. Focus only on the task set on your shoulders. They may not thank you for your success, but do not let them diminish your accomplishments. You are worthy of your titles, worthy of the power you wield. Do not forget that."

She was quiet for a time, and he could feel the call in her rising. Her breath quickly became a quiet pant. "Solas... Abelas... Thank you... For taking care of me... I... It means more than you know."

He had not wished to take her as wounded as she was, but their combined efforts had calmed her enough that the haze of her heat as well as her quiet pleas demanded they do so. Her hushed whimpers divided their soft moans, letting her rock between them, setting the pace by which they claimed her. He knew then- she had claimed them both just as completely. 

He resolutely ignored the press of the other man's knot rubbing against his own through her inner walls. It was grudgingly arousing, the stimulation of it made both their orgasms far more potent. Yet it was a constant reminder that she could not be his alone. It was uncomfortable enough that their hands occasionally met as they caressed the woman between them. Abelas didn't seem to be bothered by it as he was, even going so far as to shoot him pointedly amused looks as they took her. It set a low growl loose from his throat as he distracted himself with her mouth. He had the advantage of facing her, and she opened to him willingly.

She had fallen asleep long before they had been able to withdraw from her, repeating their gentle efforts to care for her before succumbing to sleep themselves.

And they had woken long before her, the soft light of morning snuck furtive glances at them from between the curtains. He would have to spin a tale for the advisors, and he was in a better position than Abelas to convince them. They could also do with a decent meal, as she would likely be starving once she woke. He chuckled quietly- _Among other things_. He dressed before sending a meaningful look to Abelas, conveying his wish for the man to look after her. Descending the stairs dispelling the ward at her door, he eased it open, soundlessly resealing it.

The stronghold was still quiet at this hour, the Inquisition's forces still filtering back in small groups from their excursion to the Arbor wilds. All too soon the courtyard would be filled with the harsh clash of steel, shouts and orders. But for now all was quiet. He crept to the kitchens, gathering up what he could before stopping by the rotunda to grab some of his research. They would be ensconced in her room for several days yet, and he needed something else to occupy his mind. It would be too easy to lose himself in thoughts of her, already she weighed heavily on his mind. He returned to the tower just as the fortress began to stir, knowing a war meeting was quickly approaching. He would have to head them off. Leaving the supplies and his things, he composed himself, heading out once more to address her advisors.

 

"She did not look well yesterday, is it serious? Will she recover?"

He nodded gravely, "It is serious, though we caught it in time. She will be fine in a few days. I only ask that she not be disturbed, her care is a delicate process."

They nodded, varying looks of concern at his words. The Ambassador hesitated, and then she spoke of what he feared. "There are, ah rumors... Already circulating. I'm afraid many saw the sentinel, well- quite literally sweep her off her feet. If you get a chance, could you ask her how she would like to respond to the… Ah, tales?" He chuckled ruefully, "Varric?" She laughed, an edge of amusement to her exasperation, "Among others, yes." He shook his head. "Of course, I will ask. If I may, any reports that require her attention can be left on my desk. I will bring them to her. Revas may wish to attend to them when she wakes. If you have any now, I will take them."

As he shut the door to the great hall, ascending the long stairs to her room with the stack of reports in hand he wondered if he'd truly convinced them. The parting words from the spymaster were innocuous at a glance, yet he doubted neither their double meaning, nor the hint of amusement in her lilting voice. _"Revas has been through so much lately, she could use the break. The reports can wait until she is ready."_ It was, admittedly, an odd way to react to her _"illness"._

He paused outside her door. Feeling her call, weakened by the ward- yet it was definitely discernible at this distance. She was awake. It had only been about an hour- he weighed his options, surely they couldn’t already be… He took a deep breath and dispelled the ward at her door, quickly opening it only to be met with the unmistakable sounds of their joining and the instinctive pull at his senses. Two distinctly loud moans escaped, echoing freely down the stairs even as he crossed the threshold, shutting the door and warding it in haste. He groaned- sinking back against the door. The rumors were only going to get worse. 

As he ascended the stairs, absently leaving her reports on the table, he couldn't help his gaze lingering over her being taken by the other man. It was a fascinating angle, and he watched her undulate, the seductive flex of her back as she rocked against Abelas. The man was leaned back against the headboard, and she rode him with little help. Her hips grinding small circles, limited in their effort against the capture of the knot within her. She was more in control than she had been yesterday, less at the mercy of her heat. His breath quickened as he considered the potential to take her fully coherent. It drove him wild, feeling her call being answered without having a hand in it. His length rapidly hardened, the strain of it tightly trapped against cloth was uncomfortable. He lingered in debate as he watched, transfixed. Letting the man have her for now would ensure he'd get her all to himself later. Yet, her hair was still damp, they must have bathed, which meant they had likely just started... He could just as easily join them now. 

He compromised. 

Stalking quietly up to the bed, interrupting their efforts as he turned her face, his fingers curled lightly cradling the back of her neck as he pulled her to meet him. Deepening the kiss, he claimed her mouth as the other man claimed her body. He felt the exquisite draw on his senses as she came undone, shuddering in his grasp, her moan his for the taking. He drew it into his lungs, returning her breath with his indulgent groan, his favor. Lightly biting her lip as she chased his withdrawal, his pointed gaze marked a promise for later. He reveled in the wanting look she wore, a darkened chuckle left him as he took up what remained of their breakfast, retiring to the bath that had his name on it as surely as she did.

He sank slowly into the heated water, popping a small pastry into his mouth, savoring the taste... She must have had one- It was precisely the same sweetness that had lingered on her tongue. A throaty groan left him against his will, loud enough to be overheard. Biting down on his lip he stifled the sounds the joining in the other room threatened to call forth. He laid there for a time, letting the heat of the bath soothe away the ache in muscles that hadn't gotten much use in many an age. Absently attempting to ignore the urge despite his thoughts lingering on the taste of her, his arousal was quickly becoming difficult to endure. His panting breath arose unbidden as he listened to the other man claim her. He couldn’t help but ride the current of her cries, escalating in insistency. He sighed as succumbed, rising up, bracing himself on the edge of the tub. Closing his eyes, he took himself in hand, careful shallow strokes to avoid agitating his knot. Without the tight heat of her clenched around him, without the close proximity of her call it was less likely to swell, but it wouldn't do to ruin his bath or his chances at claiming her alone later. Tugging languorously, swiping the pad of his thumb over the sensitive tip already beading with the evidence of his arousal, he lost himself in fantasy. Imagining how her mouth might feel, how the sweet twist of her tongue would lave against his shaft. How her moans would be stifled with the fullness of his length, the feel of them vibrating deep in him. Stroking slow, he thrust hard into his fist, tightening his grip to mirror how tightly she took him. He imagined her eyes fixed on his, the knowing look she might wear as she kept him at her mercy. He pumped faster, feeling another tug at his senses as she cried out in the other room. He was close, muscles tensing, the escalating throb, his sack tightened as he brought himself over the edge. He came with a soft moan, echoing faintly in the small room, he spilled into his fist as his release flowed through him, milking his shaft with his other hand. It took the edge off his desire, yet it paled in comparison to the full release she could coax from him. He groaned at the thought, wiping his hand off on a spare cloth. He settled back into the water even as he settled into his wait.

 

It hadn’t taken long for them to finish. He returned to her side, keeping watch as Abelas lay fast asleep at her back. He had attempted to lose himself in a book he acquired from her shelves, all thoughts of focusing on his research already abandoned. Yet… his thoughts were drawn to her inescapably. He found himself watching her curiously. Dozing in and out of consciousness she would wake briefly, realize she had thrown her arms around him and quietly withdraw- Only for the cycle to repeat while she slept. It seemed she secretly enjoyed the close contact and it stung that she seemed to be ashamed of her proclivity. At her last waking he caught up her hand and placed it gently over his heart, wordlessly bidding her to feel how she made it race. She did not pull away after that, a look of quiet fascination consumed her before sleep claimed her once more. 

Heat began rolling off her, a slight sheen to her skin, the subtle scent of her arousal sent him hard with need. Her sleep grew fitful and he worried briefly it was another nightmare. But then she woke calling out his name, and he barely felt the pang of annoyance that it wasn't the only name she called. She called _him_ , and he could answer. Abelas still lay asleep from his earlier efforts and Revas lay wanting. He had been waiting patiently and taking her separately seemed to stave off the heat for a shorter time than when they took her together. He found he didn't mind.

“How quiet can you be Revas?”

The way she looked at him took his breath away. Her eyes blown wide, her expression hid nothing, and told _everything_. Her every movement was written in lines of want. Nothing else mattered in that moment- she could scream and alert the whole fortress and Abelas besides so long as she kept looking at him like _that_. It was disarming and it set his own need loose, stronger than by her call alone.

He quickly coated his hand in the salve, applying a thin coat to her, and roughly rubbing the rest over his length. He would not have long, but he wished... _Oh he wished_. He settled between her thighs, guiding the throbbing head of his cock to her entrance, her hands pleading, begging as she sought to draw him in close. He thrust in shallow strokes, parting her as he sank deeper. He felt it begin to swell, pulling out quickly- driving back in. Rutting into her relentlessly, counting seconds as his knot pulled free again and again, she cried out, he groaned. The last pull of it coming loose set her writhing around him. He was out of time. He thrust _hard_ , rocking against her, working his knot past the tight clench of her entrance, rocking it into her even as it grew. His hips abruptly met hers as she accepted it, she cried out as it expanded, pressing in further. He gasped as she canted her hips to take him deeper and he could only oblige- Alternating his rocking thrusts to pull at her entrance then push deep. She shook, her eyes locked to his, and he saw it bloom in her depths- the magnificent release claimed her, his name carried on her cry as she flexed around him. He sank over her, winding her up in an embrace as she curled upward into him, her nails dug into his back. His teeth found her neck, his hips held firmly to hers as the pull of her release brought him his. The desperate sounds she coaxed from him endured through the entirety of the first pulse he spilled into her. 

Her hands left his back and he relented his bite, looking up in time for her to capture his jaw once more. The fire in her gaze, it very nearly burned him. To be faced with it again... He realized then it had been something she had lacked for many months now.

He could no longer tell if he had her... Or if she had him.

 

He'd rolled her on top of him, too weakened from his sustained release to continue setting their pace, letting her ride him as she chased her own, again... _And again_. He was entranced at the sight of her, the look in her eyes as she planted her hands firmly on his stomach, the flex of her muscles as she rolled her hips, the soft bounce of her breasts. He was entirely at her mercy, a complete reversal of how they had begun and he could no longer deny how deeply he desired her domination of his body. Yet as he pulsed within her once more she cried out, shuddering, suddenly stilling her effort as his release poured into her. His quiet moan became a startled gasp to echo hers. 

She was pinned by that gaze. A realization dawning in his eyes even as she felt it wind through her, threads, feather light in her chest, weaving imperceptible golden strands. A complex net settled in them all, subtle pulls as they moved, alerting her to their slightest shifts, heartbeats echoing in time with hers. Her fingers drifted automatically to her lips far too late, long after her gasp left her. It was different... _They_ were different. She was vaguely aware that Abelas had woken with a gasp. The quiet panting that flowed in the wake of their understanding was all that dare tread upon this new territory for several moments.

Her heat burned on, yet the haze had lifted.

"Solas?"

He seemed to have trouble finding the words that Abelas spoke so freely. "You are bound to us, and we to you." He took up her hand, threading his fingers through even as Solas caught her other mid-descent, as it left her mouth in disbelief. "You are mated, and for as long as we are able we will answer your call."

Her gaze switched to the man who spoke, still fearful of her sudden clarity. No longer lost to the haze, she had to face their actions fully. No longer could she lose herself in the vague grasping hands, the fullness that locked her to the man beneath her. That locked her to... _To Solas_.

She tentatively found her voice, feeling with a strange certainty of what she spoke, catching both their eyes. "I am yours. And you... You are mine." The soft intake of breath from Solas was almost lost to her as Abelas kissed her. There was a subtle hunger in him she hadn't realized before. It left her dazed as he pulled away. Mirroring the efforts Solas had taken earlier. She did not miss the challenge in their shared look before Abelas stalked off to the bath, the sound of water filling the tub echoed in the silence that ensued. She was alone with Solas. Her gaze brought abruptly back to his as she felt the subtle swell of his length. The minute aspects of their joining she had missed in the haze were suddenly in sharp focus. It set her panting, a hotter blush spreading across her face.

She was breathless until the throbbing within her intensified, the strong twitch and the hot spill of his seed set her moan free. Solas' fingers tightened around hers, his other hand left her hip. His fingertips trailing lightly across her skin, she knew their heading. Helpless in their wake, unable to move, pinned by that the wanting look he wore so well. He circled the bundle of nerves as his moan softened his expression. That he would not break her gaze even as he spilled within her further fueled her desires. He teased, dangerously close, yet maddeningly out of reach. She wanted, yet she had no words to beg with. His own want became clear. At the next slow circle he drew, she brought her hips forward, the sudden tug of his knot pulled at her as his fingers slipped- a feather light touch at her clit. It was not enough, she panted out her desperation, and desire darkened his eyes once more. She repeated the movement, and still he teased. _So close_ , a frustrated moan fell from her lips, freeing her from her shocked silence. She begged, pleaded, _“Solas... please...”_ On her next thrust his palm pressed heavily to the small nub, her eyes widened, feeling it build, she ground once more against his hand- snapping her hips against his capture. She curled inward falling to his chest as she cried out his name. Her violent release set her hips shuddering against him. He held her tightly, rolling his hips up into her, prolonging her release. The world spun as he rolled _her_ , dominated her. He made her _his_. She shook apart to the sound of his growl and he was all that held her together.

 

He woke still within her, his full weight settled over her. She had succumbed to exhaustion, and he had apparently followed before his knot had released her. It was a merciful waking, her face pressed against his pulse at his neck, and his against hers. The measured beats sang an intimate song just for them. He stiffened at the hand on his shoulder before he realized it was Abelas. He bit his lip as he withdrew, stifling the groan as his seed followed, dripping from her, coating her thighs.

He accepted the cloth the man offered wordlessly, cleaning himself. He had grown hard again- mildly thankful he hadn't knotted her in his sleep. He didn't have the heart to wake her so soon. Dipping the cloth in the basin at his side, heating the water with a touch, wringing it out, he set in cleaning his spend from her.

He was… relieved that they had been able to bond her so quickly, her heat would be more manageable. In spite of his relief he couldn't help the aching pang that it would end soon, perhaps three days more spent in this unexpected respite. His gaze turned wistful as he cared for her. She presented something he couldn't have. She presented a mystery he didn't have time to unravel. She had been without color before... _But now_. Now there was a hue in her he couldn't even begin to describe. The color of her spirit had no name known to him and she was _vibrant_. He decided then, he would let it last for as long as he could.

Abelas lay down next to her after he finished washing her. He watched as the man gently pulled her into his embrace. It needled at him that he would be required to share her, yet it pained him worse to know it was for the best. He could not care for her as she deserved on his own.

He spoke quietly as he watched Abelas stroke her. "Will you look after her? After I leave? She will need it, she's not one who does well alone." The man nodded, caressing the sleep softened lines of her form. "And if she tries to stop you? Tries to follow you?" He answered without hesitation, "Let her. It is my hope that she will understand. The well will offer insight, _guide_ her. If she wishes to prove me wrong, then I will welcome the chance." He sighed. "Until then I must endure."

The man fixed him with a reproving gaze. "And what of the anchor?"

"I will come back for it, before it’s too late. I would not see her die because of my mistake." 

He watched the slow rise and fall of her chest and he couldn't help but wonder where he'd be a year from now- how many of his plans will have moved forward, and if he could manage to break away from it all for a short time, to address her heat- to indulge in the rare respite he'd found.

"In a year’s time... I may seek her out, for her next heat." He added quietly, "If she will let me."

The man allowed a rare smile, "I hope you do. She is... A handful."

He chuckled quietly. _That she was._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally Abelas was going to catch feels first, but then _I_ caught feels, and usually that ends up with Solas catching feels.
> 
> May or may not revise this a bit later. Allergies make my brain fuzzy, and for all I know this entire chapter could really be about cheese or something. It's probably ok. Maybe. Probably a bit before the next chapter- Pov Abelas.


	3. It set with the moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said POV Abelas, clearly I meant POV everyone. There's a fair amount of unavoidable dialog. The epilogue will be mostly POV Abelas. 
> 
> This was, _holy mother of void_ , very uh _distracting_ to write. 
> 
> I apparently don't believe in smut Saturday- more like smut everyday haha.
> 
> Want a sketchy visualization? [Heh heh heh.](https://marevasan-after-dark.tumblr.com/post/147943324299/and-so-it-begins-wip-for-the-last-chapter-of) \- ~~Slightly~~ NSFW

It had taken convincing to gain Solas' participation, but he knew once he agreed it would take hold in the man, roots that wound deep and anchored. The wolf desperately needed something to ground him, and ground him she did. It had not gone unnoticed to him that Solas was quickly binding himself to her in ways that couldn't be weighed, and the man was falling hard. It had been the fledgling fruition of his plan the moment he felt the call and realized it was _her_. He'd seen the way the wolf looked at her when he thought no one would notice, his subtle desire had been written in his every interaction, the slight misdirection in his focus as he paused in his work when she walked by, his eyes trailing her steps, the light that rose in the gaze he'd don when she spoke- it was painfully obvious despite his reservations. He had thought the fascination curious at first, perhaps a subjective intrigue. Yet as he watched the wolf engage in his silent struggle he realized it was more than just the mark nestled in the palm of her hand. Though, once insinuated he _too_ fervently denied such interest. _That_ was perhaps the most telling of all.

Carefully prodding the man, playing at his jealousy, fueling the selfish need to claim her alone, it only provoked the wolf to grasp her tighter. He was predictable in his pride, but _she_... She could be the quench that tempered his steel, to harden his focus. He hoped she would force him to think creatively, to consider more possibilities, and limit him from forging on blindly at any cost in his redemption. Enough damage had been done by his blind action. _Enough had been lost_. The opportunity she presented was such a natural culmination of desire that the wolf did not seem to suspect his motives, and he hoped it was subtle enough to stay that way.

Abelas was no stranger to sharing, it had been the way of things in his long watch over the temple. Yet... She was not what he had assumed. A shadow, small, and vulnerable yes, but there was a strength in her spirit, in her lithe form that was as much a surprise as the lingering bruise on his chest. That her heat did not make her savage, little more than an animal was... unexpected. She had quietly endured, embarrassed, confused. She asked, begged instead of demanded or took by force. His efforts with her had been by rote at first, he showed her kindness, mercy, knowing it would make it easier on her. Quietly cursing Solas for his stubborn anger, the man's penchant for conflict nearly cost him his participation.

Yet even as he offered her up to Solas, he was surprised to find his own grasp on her tightening. He had tried to convince himself it was simply the influence of the well within her, the familiarity in the proximity of duty, the need to protect what she embodied, but the excuse was the wrong shape- it did not fit the curves of her form where they pressed against him, the soft color of her eyes unfocused in pleasure, the sound of her moans threaded through his name unabashedly absent of the apology it bore. He'd been bonded before and broken, however... his bond to her had settled lightly in his chest. It was strangely reassuring.

Now that the haze had lifted, her eyes sharp as they locked to his, he found he couldn't look away. Though inevitably she still did, lingering embarrassment despite the fact she sat bare astride his hips, despite the evidence of his arousal and the growing response to her call almost painfully hard between them, or perhaps because of it. He tipped her chin, coaxing her to look up, "You have nothing to be ashamed of Revas, this is only natural. It is something to cherish."

Her bitten lip set free as her gaze fled from his, "It's not that, not _entirely_... I'm not opposed, but you... The things you said, how could you want this?" A soft sigh left him, it seems he'd misjudged her again and _that_ was a topic they had expected eventually but not quite so soon. "I mean, the voices they're confused, I am what I was, but also not? A shade, but not. It's like I have one foot out of the shadows. I don't know what to make of it." Her blush deepened up the edge of her ears as she fought the call, "I don't know what to make of you. Either of you."

His hand drifted to her cheek, stroking his thumb across the high arch of her cheekbone, her brows furrowed, eyes shut tight as she leaned in to the touch. She trembled in her effort to remain still, wrapping her arms tightly about her herself. It was such a small effort yet it pulled at him with a disproportionate strength, and he was struck with how abruptly he longed to rid her of such insecurity, of the pain she carried. He took a deep breath, making an effort to take the time hardened edge off his voice, attempting to match her soft tone. "There is time to sort that out. For now, know that my assessment was... _Incomplete_. I judged you more quickly than you deserved. I apologize, do not think you are unwanted Revas, that _this_ is unwanted." He leaned in pressing what he hoped was a reassuring kiss to the downturned curve of her lips, the soft unbidden whimper she gave him was as telling as the fire that lived in her skin. She would not be able to delay much longer, though it need not continue unkindly in her confusion. "This bond is not a burden. You are... desirable as a mate." She chuckled weakly, the anchored hand rising to further obscure her sight, "Why Abelas, that was almost a nice thing to say. Are you sure you're alright?" His smirk was unasked for and unseen by her, but genuine, "It seems I must endeavor to change your opinion of me, as you have changed my opinion of you." And with that she willingly met his gaze once more, the honest relief lingering there was not obscured by the quiet plea that quickly rose in her eyes once more.

He reached for the jar that lay half hidden among her sheets, quickly coating his length in the salve that would ease his passage. Leaving the resealed jar to be forgotten once more, he lifted her up as she planted her hands on his shoulders, guiding himself to her entrance as she slowly eased down. He groaned softly through clenched teeth as the heat of her enveloped him. Fighting the urge to thrust her downwards, to sink deep, took effort. As he slowly filled her, his rough uneven breaths were the undertone to her soft moan, the first notes in the song of their pleasure as she took him, finally accepting his rapidly growing knot. How she could nearly undo him by that act alone escaped him as higher thought melted away. His grip on her tightened as he tied her securely. He longed to move, to _succumb_ , she trembled with a short cry and he knew she was captured, knew deep- written in the answer in his blood that she was already close. But then she reached up, eyes blown wide into a thin ring of fire, firmly planting her palms on either side of his jaw, stretching up tugging at the tie as she bade him to lean down. The kiss she gave him was passionate, her tongue parted his lips and he quickly met her effort. It spoke of a greater depth than the halting words that had passed between them. She unraveled him with her unspoken words as deliberately as her hips rocking against him, only when she came undone over him did she withdraw, curling against his chest crying out as he held her still, pressing his hips upward, falling, the edge ever closer within the flex of her core. His head thrown back helpless as he succumbed, his loud moan rose up to join hers.

As the first wave abated into a quiet lull he looked down, breathless, to see the small tilt of mirth on her face. Her amusement clear despite the heated look she wore half obscured against his chest. "You should let go more often... it's... _very_ becoming on you." He half chuckled before her hips set in motion turned it into a breathless groan. He fixed her with a falteringly stern gaze as he maneuvered her legs to lock behind his back, her blatant curiosity quickly shifting to widened surprise as he slid off the edge of the bed, gripping the backs of her thighs as he stood with her. Her arms quickly wrapped around his neck as she clung to him.

His renewed smirk was a short lived thing as his amusement softened into a throaty moan- his lip hastily bitten against the sound as he began to thrust haltingly against her, her hips bouncing off his, tugging at his tie within her at the apex of each short arc. He took great pleasure in the evidence of _hers_ , her fingers curled tight around the back of his neck, eyes distantly locked to his, lips parted in an eternal moan.  He felt the exquisite tension mounting low in his core, his breath quickened to a quiet pant, the edge of a deeper sound building in his chest as his release threatened to claim him once more. The knowing look in her eyes captured him as she began to react to the throb of his length within her. Her release bloomed to shatter her focus, her fingers dug into his shoulders as the slow grind of her hips set her keening. He sank weak to his knees with her as his spend flowed forth. He succumbed as she desired, carefully falling forward with her to the carpet, thrusting forcefully against her as far as his knot would allow. Letting her heat claim him, as she let him claim her.

The name he bore became a desperate litany from her lips, fingers scrambling for purchase against his back. He drove her to the brink again and _again_ until she was left shaking and limp in his care as he rocked gently into her, panting through his last release. The finality of the pleasure it carried left them both sated and weak. He kissed her through the lingering echoes, and it took all he had to pull her up with him, staggering back to the bed to wait out the release of his knot. He lay over her, careful to keep most of his weight off her, yet enough to pin her securely. Enough to assert his sudden need to _claim_ , to convince her thoroughly that he was more than what she thought. That he was no mere spectator to her need.

Her astonishment was plain to see and he carried a secret delight in her loss of words.

"That was... That felt... I..."

" _That_ , was how it should be between bond mates."

Her soft sigh carried contentment as he felt what little tension remaining in her unravel, a sound he echoed as her palms slid around his back, holding him tight.

 

Solas set down the newest batch of reports, pausing at the disarray of sheets spiraling outward from the dozing form nestled amid them. The sound of water running in the small room suggested Abelas had answered her call not too long ago. He forcefully quelled the annoyance that threatened to overshadow the calm he carefully crafted to deal with her advisors, stripping unceremoniously as he strode to the bed. Wasting no time curling up around her, reveling in the peace that found him as his skin met hers, fighting the urge to immediately mask the scent of the sentinel that clung to her. She murmured her surprise, half asleep as he wound her up close. Her voice full of concern he hadn't expected, "What's wrong Solas?"

He pressed a kiss to the back of her bared neck, his gaze lingering over a small reddened mark he hadn't left, uneasily diverting his selfishness. "It is nothing, I simply wished to be close to you."

A soft sigh left her. "Mmm that's a nice wish." She chuckled quietly, "I wish I wasn't so confused."

"Oh?" He considered as she contented herself with a quiet murmur of assent, wondering if now was the right time to address what he guessed, that in her newfound clarity she might remember his... _Unfortunate_ choice of words from before. He had hardly been kind in her vulnerability, and for her to suddenly be faced with his care... It worried him, that he may lose what he so tentatively had, and worse she would not be wrong to deny him. "What is it that concerns you?"

A deep yawn parted her reply, "All of it... I don't know how it is you don't hate me for this, and for... _The temple_. Abelas said he didn't... But I don't know how."

He gently rolled her to face him, hoping to help her face what she was far freer in divulging on the edge of dreams. "How could we hate you Revas?"

"You were so rude, angry... Didn't wanna be here..."

He sighed, wishing he had been wrong. "That could not be further from the truth." He leaned in, pressing the kiss that unfurrowed her brow- chasing it with what little honest reassurance he could offer her. "I would not be here if I did not wish to be. You are... not what I expected, and you should not have felt the need to carry such a burden. My reaction was... honest, but my anger was misattributed. I did not wish to see you bound, though I agree there was little choice. I simply wish it had not fallen to you." The words rang hollow to him with the realization that had she chose differently, he wouldn't be here, he wouldn't have _this_ , he wouldn't have _her_. It pained him despite the hint of a smile that stole across her lips, "It seems to be all I do, constantly change people's expectations..." He watched it grow into an amusing scowl fully in the realm of annoyance. "Mmph just thinking about it makes me tired."

He chuckled quietly, tentatively relieved with her acceptance, unable to disagree.

 

She curled up against his chest with a sudden wealth of confidence that it wouldn't be unwelcome. Her thoughts far too unhindered for her own good, "How did I end up with two very attractive men in my bed? This has got to be the best luck I've had in years."

_"Oh?"_

"Mmhm don't act like you don't know how pretty you are Solas. That quiet confidence, always strutting around."

He scoffed lightly, "I do not strut."

"You most certainly do."

She snorted quietly as Solas shot a threatening look at Abelas, stealing a glance at the sentinel as he strode back into the room, an inquiry written plainly in the wisp of a raised brow. "You do too Abelas. Don't tell me you haven't noticed all the looks you've been getting?"

The rising scowl disturbing his usual stone-faced features was once something that filled her with apprehension, now it was positively _charming_. "What? What looks?"

She chuckled lightly, closing her eyes once more. Amused that the elf with a stare that missed nothing could manage to miss so much. "Plenty of women and more than a few men can't keep their eyes off you."

"That is absurd." He paused, catching the flaw in her admission, "...and how would you know?"

She yawned again, quietly begging the Fade for more time, deciding there was little sense in denying her previously infuriating infatuation, "You think I can't stare with the rest of them while you two plot away? I just happen to pay attention to who else is staring. Though, that's exactly what you get for wearing the loudest armor in the entire fortress."

She felt Solas' reply rumble through his chest more than heard, lending his words a far sultrier quality than he likely intended. "You find us... _Desirable_?"

Her brow furrowed in annoyance, partially at their questions keeping her from flirting with sleep and partially that she thought it rather obvious. "Of course I do. Any more questions?"

Abelas chuckled lightly. "Plenty."

She finally sat up, rubbing her eyes, squinting at the man. He seemed serious, but then when wasn't he? "Wait, really?"

Solas nodded slowly, drawing her gaze. "Typically before a first heat, the potential mates were long since chosen, bonding was not done lightly. It often took years to settle on the initial mates..." She wilted visibly against her will, and Solas paused to pull her back down to lay against him, running his fingers through her hair. "It is nothing you had control over. It was commonplace to... Acquire new mates through the years. They were generally subject to less scrutiny than the first." She tried to be comforted by his words, but she couldn't get past the fact that she always seemed to do things backwards. She opened her mouth only for him to gently hush her, "There is no need to apologize."

"How did you know that I..." She trailed off, her fleeting annoyance fell away at the smile that tugged at his eyes.

"You always do." He resumed the careful mapping of the curve of her ear, "There is time for answers later, if you wish to sleep."

She shook her head lightly, not wanting to sleep through that curious fondness he wore, "I can stay awake, well... If I could have something stronger than tea." She chuckled ruefully, "Though I don't think I should be the one to go get it."

Abelas reluctantly volunteered, and she was glad as Solas didn't seem to have any intent to relinquish her anytime soon. They lay quiet in each other's arms while Abelas dressed and set off down the stairs. It was exceedingly difficult to stay awake in the comfort he offered, listening to his measured breaths and the lull of the rise and fall of his chest. The strong beat of his heart pulling at her own. She couldn't pin down exactly when it was she began to truly desire what they offered. One thing was for certain, it clearly wasn't some cruel joke, though a new fear was beginning to take its place. Worried what would happen... after. It came as no surprise that Solas seemed to guess her growing turmoil of thought.

"How do you feel Revas?"

She looked up to meet his gaze, entranced with the reflection of calm in his eyes... He looked, content? She wasn't sure what it was about it that was so surprising to her, and she worried asking him now would shatter such a peace. She shooed the fear away, "Better than I have in quite a long time." She canted her head to better watch his expression, considering the strange man who admittedly became less strange to her by the hour. "What about you? How do you feel?"

His smile crinkled the corners of his eyes as he reached to tuck a rogue strand of hair behind her ear. "Fortunate." He gently pulled her in, his lips met hers with no demand. It felt loving, honest, and she reveled in the softness of his mouth, the way he shivered when she lightly ran her fingers down the back of his neck. He deftly laid claim to her lips until Abelas returned- and by the smell of it, he'd found coffee.

She alternated between amusement and lighthearted dread as Abelas recanted the tale of his trip to the kitchens. She'd almost go so far as to call it a saga for the embellished dramatic descriptions of the obstacles he encountered. One would think the trip had taken years and she suppressed a laugh at the picture he painted with the brusque strokes of annoyance. He'd only worn a loose shirt and the tight leggings that lay under his armor for his tromp through the fortress, and his delay was related to a certain dwarf and a handful of overly curious nobles. They had never seen him out of his armor and they had also not seen him in days. She did not look forward to facing what lay in wait below them, growing ever more impatient in rumor.

Solas sat behind her propped against the headboard, and she lay back, comfortable against him, sipping from the warm mug clutched tight between her hands. A deep sigh left her before she breathed it in feeling slightly more lucid within the spice that warmed her. Abelas settled in next to them, laying out the small basket of pastries he'd procured. She smirked as they indulged, wondering what the staff would think of the sorry state of her sheets when this was all over.

"What would you like to know? What did potential mates know of each other before bonding?"

Abelas considered her for a moment before answering, "Truthfully, much of what knowledge was traded dealt in bloodlines, talents, and status. Bonding usually led to breeding, furthering lineages, establishing alliances and influence, not always for the first heat, but it was assumed eventually conception would occur with those mated." Her eyes widened, her cup frozen halfway to her mouth. She hadn't had a moment to even consider that aspect, comforted in the apparent safety of the awful bitter tea. This had all been far too new to examine the potential for either of them to sire a child... Her... Their... _They were staring_. She carefully resumed sipping from her cup, stalling as her thoughts derailed. Bonding with them wasn't something she had taken lightly by any means, even without much of a choice, but this made it significantly more serious than she realized. She quickly diverted her thoughts, opting to address the easier topic, "I'm afraid I probably fail most standards in each of those accounts."

He shook his head, "It was important to some, but not all. It is not something we would judge you for."

She tried to ignore the fact that they had already judged her for it once, as well as the fact that Solas was quickly growing hard at her back. It seemed he was content to ignore it as well.

"Then ...what else was traded?"

"Hmmm, likes and dislikes, passions... Dreams, aspirations."

She let a small smile settle into place, liking this list much better even though it wasn't without its own brand of sadness. So she began telling them lightly of things she once had wished for herself- carefully skirting around the weight of her fate that made them all little more than wistful fantasy.

 

Shortly after Abelas had traded her for knowledge Solas picked her up, carrying her off despite her light protest, stating simply that he desired a bath. Which meant apparently she did too. He had been curiously silent at their trade, but then he rarely divulged much about himself. It couldn't linger to bother her as he failed to hide his annoyance that Abelas had followed to join them. _Now that was a curious thing_ , she bit down on her amusement, knowing full well the man had already bathed just a short time before.

She sat in the bath firmly between them while the two of them fussed over her. She let them, watching them with a wonder she couldn't hide. It was such a change from the two standoffish elves that had barricaded her room days ago.

They were surprisingly gentle. _Well,_ with _her._

Solas was leveling Abelas with a stare so pointed she half expected a barrier to be cast. His palm held out, waiting, silently demanding the cloth. She was losing the battle to keep her grin from surfacing as Abelas determinedly ignored it, scrubbing her back with meticulous care. They both paused at her stifled chuckle, the bewildered looks only made it more difficult to contain.

"You two are being ridiculous... There's more... on the shelf."

The power struggle continued as deliberate silent threats grazed past her, it seemed neither wished to back down.

She shook her head, bracing her hands on the edge of the tub, attempting to stand only to have two pairs of hands arrested her effort. It was Solas that stood first, stepping out of the bath to fetch the extras, and her stare was perhaps a little too obvious. Following the trail of water clinging to his lean form, running swiftly over the jut of his narrow hips, carving down the defined lines of his thighs. A knowing look crossed his features as he sauntered back to the tub, the sway of a smug victory in his steps, she couldn't bring herself to look away even knowing she'd likely never live it down.

She took up a spare cloth, a small smile on her face stretched inward fueled by a deep sense of contentment she hadn't bore in quite a long time. It was quickly becoming as permanent as her blush. She wetted the cloth without notice, subtly rubbing it into the soap that bobbed neglected floating across the surface. Solas stilled as she brought the cloth to his chest, her gaze focused on her efforts to avoid his. She was surprised that he let her. Sliding closer, settling in his lap as she brought her arms around him, she scrubbed his back as he held her. The slow rise and fall of his chest set the cadence of her effort. When she finished she pulled back, his expression was mixed, difficult to read. The soft kiss he pressed to her lips told her all she needed to know. There was no demand there, just quiet adoration.

She reluctantly turned away, setting to work on Abelas. The man sat just as quiet, enduring her small gesture as Solas had. She unbound his long braid, shifting to his lap as she worked by touch alone to unravel the intricate weave. It brought her chest close to his face as she neared the top, and she could see the blush rising on him, delighting in the hint of red clashing with the lines of green. He allowed her to continue, only disturbing her work to press a small kiss between her breasts. As she quietly washed his hair, her careful concentration waned to a small smirk, sensing a slight annoyance from Solas as he began to wash hers. Her hair hadn't truly needed it, but she suspected he wanted to divide her attention. She finished rinsing, rebinding Abelas' hair in a much simpler braid to keep it out of the water as Solas finished binding hers in a loose twist gathered at her neck. Pulling back, Abelas upped the gesture, not meeting her lips with the quiet capture Solas had, but with a kiss that was much more _branding_.

It left her breathless, and in the yawning silence that followed she finally chuckled- relieved that small defiance hadn't started a war.

When they finally climbed out of her bath, she didn't bother to dress, just wandered to her bed, flopping down on it. Her heat had been steadily on the rise again, and she knew it wouldn't be long before they would be tasked to answer the call. Staring up at the ceiling, she let herself be lost in thought. The warmth that began to tint her skin led her thoughts to equally heated things. Marveling at how her opinion had changed of their physical peculiarity, no longer afraid of the difference- it was _inescapably_ arousing how they took her. How their bodies demanded release before, well, _releasing her_. It was undeniably intimate. Though it made her wonder how the Elvhen ever accomplished any of their great works- musing that perhaps that's why they were such long lived.

The mattress dipped on either side of her as the two of them settled in, joining her watch over the high arch of the ceiling. She quietly contemplated them. There was more to them than the deep reserves of calm, the carefully wrought composure, the depth of years that hung as heavily as their weighted names. They came alive when they took her. None of the reserved looks, the hesitation. The passion that surfaced in them was... Unexpected to say the least. She found herself hoping it wouldn't end with her heat. Taking a deep breath, she finally gathered the courage to face the fear that stalked her.

"What does this mean for us?"

The question seemed to catch them both by surprise as the ceiling promptly lost its audience. "I mean... Well... _After_." The web of shared glances almost provoked a laugh from her, the smile surface anyways.

It was Solas who finally spoke in carefully measured, if not largely unhelpful words. "After a heat is satisfied, those that sated it..." He sighed lightly. "There are many ways this could go." He trailed off into quiet bated breaths once more and she knew he wouldn't make this choice for her. She caught his gaze with startling ease, there was... Something there, lingering, hopeful? She turned to glance at Abelas, his expression was expectant, but not imposing. She willed the slight tremble from her voice as she put herself on the line, "I would like if you stayed, both of you. If... That is what you want."

She hadn't realized how much tension they held until it drained from them.

"There will be talk, the rumors are already spreading."

She sighed, "Of course there are. Don't they have anything better to do?"

Solas chuckled and the weight in her chest grew lighter at the amusement that returned to his tone. "Perhaps, but it would seem not. They only grow wilder each time I appear."

"How bad?"

"They know something is up. Varric in particular has already guessed far too much for his own good. I suspect Cole has been... _Talkative_."

She laughed despite it being worse than she hoped. " _Oh_ I can only imagine." She paused thoughtfully, wondering aloud, "Does it bother you? Either of you?"

Abelas spoke simply, "No." And for once she welcomed his confident brevity. Solas was predictably more evasive. "The implications? No, though I expect the questions will persist if not addressed." She smiled, quietly nodding at the accurate assessment, content to not let it consume her for the moment. Even though they hadn't said it outright, it seemed they at least considered continuing whatever it was they had forged.

Abelas ventured, "Does it bother you, Revas?"

That was an answer she had already pondered, confident in its truth, "Not anymore." She glanced aside at Solas as he propped himself up on an elbow, looking for her elaboration. "It would have before... But. How could I ever regret this? You both have shown me kindness I... Had long since given up on. A kindness... I'll admit I didn't expect from either of you." She sighed, softening her slight exasperation with a wry smile, "You two were... Rather rude."

"Our distance was-"

"Necessary, I know. I have no intention to betray your secret Solas. I just... Wanted insight, the voices don't lie, but I don't always know the right questions to ask. And they're not always great at context." She took a deep breath, tentatively delving into that which pained her most about their uncaring distance, hoping their responses would better inform her of what they intended. If she could trust this strange arrangement. "I... Feel lost. I've lost all I had, all I was since they raised me up and... All I've gained are things I shouldn't have. Influence, the knowledge of the well, the anchor... I feel like a thief in my own skin. I didn't want this and I have nothing to stand on. Everything I believed, everything I was taught was a lie. Even the lines on my face..." She sighed, her fingers tracing the raised markings. "I just wanted help... Understanding the truth."

"Stand with us." She turned to Abelas, looking for an explanation to his sudden declaration but found none. She looked to Solas, barely catching the warning he shot the sentinel, the look quickly shifting to an intense gaze that burned away all else. He did not deign to elaborate either. They both seemed to be holding their breaths. She closed her eyes, listening to the Vir'abelasan, they... seemed to approve of such a direction? Though she supposed it may have been little more than the lure of the sentinel that swayed them. Quieting them gently, she considered the ambiguous offer on her own. They seemed to fear her answer as she had feared theirs... And If she truly wanted answers, if she wanted the truth... It would likely lay with them. And truthfully it was that or her life spent wandering the wilds without direction.

_Put like that the choice was easy._

"I will stand with you."

A soft _"Oh-"_ left her as they wound themselves around her. The heat of them, the press of their bodies wove quickly through her. The heat within her purred to a dull roar.

_They called, and she answered._

 

They pinned her between them like they had the first time. Abelas at her back, Solas at her front, both securely locked inside her. Oh but they were cruel. They had puzzled out something she couldn't explain, that when they kept her still, completely immobilized at the mercy of their movements- it made her release mind numbingly potent. Which in turn, seemed to make theirs equally as volatile. Abelas had her pinned tight against his chest, an arm across her shoulders, another tight around her waist trapping her arms. Solas kept a firm grip on her hips. She begged, pleaded, cried out with a wavering whine yet they only whispered quiet praise in answer.

"How does it feel to be filled by us, locked to us, unable to escape the pleasure we will give you?"

Abelas trailed tantalizing bites up her neck to the tip of her ear. "Will you sing for us your pleasure? _Ohhh_ how tightly you hold us within you." Solas nipped the hollow of her throat, daring to take a hand off her hip to softly caress her, an infuriatingly light touch cupping the weight of her breast, teasing the edge of a nipple, trailing lower until he reached a spot that had her muscles twitching as it tickled. "How badly do you wish for release? How long will you last at our mercy?" The flat of his palm pressed heavily down her shaking thigh only to run back up to tease the bundle of nerves, and repeat the cycle over. It quickly had her aching, her pulse growing stronger around their shafts, the dull throb of her flesh set their names loose from her lips, entreating them to complete her, to give her the release she needed. "Solas, Abelas _please!_ " She fought to move once more, their grip tightened. "Can you feel the pulse of our hearts within you? In our bond? Yours beats so strongly." The low edge of a moan in her ear sent a shiver through her. "You are a strong mate, and you are _ours_." The anticipation was almost painful, the heat unbearable, how they kept so still, how they refrained from thrusting into her was beyond her comprehension.

She _clenched_ with all her might using the only movement left in her command, hoping to force an end to this stalemate, and two startled moans reverberated against her neck. Yet no chastisement met her effort, only firmer bites, caresses that carried more weight. She repeated the move several times, reveling in how wanton they sounded. It would have been fascinating if she didn't have a desperate goal. Then as her heartbeat grew so strong in her core she could have sworn her heart had moved, they both thrust upward as Solas' hand pressed heavily to her clit. Three agonizingly slow thrusts and she arched violently against her capture, her scream laden with release barely registered to her senses over the dual tug within her, the powerful undulation of her core drawing them in deeper. Their gasps quickly lost as their hold tightened, harsh bites scarcely muffled loud cries, a synchronized throb within her preceded the hot spill that rode the pronounced pulses that shuddered through her. Disbelief was a foreign concept entirely lost to her as she moaned her praise for them, how good they felt locked to her, how the hot wash of their spend filled her, how she loved the press of them.

How they _completed_ her.

 

She wasn't sure how precisely they ended up in their current heap, Abelas flat on his back with her pinned on top of him, underneath Solas who was sprawled out over her. Each slight shift sent a cascade of soft sounds of lingering pleasure drifting to fill the stuffy dimly lit tower. The heat of their efforts, the constant roulette of steaming baths and heated coupling lent the room the atmosphere of a jungle. The thought amused her quietly, it was not unlike the temple in the wilds that brought them here in the first place.

Yet despite the heat of the room, of their forms shielding her from the air, she felt distinctly _chilled_... Just when she finally thought she had a grasp on precisely what was happening to her, it seemed to change ever so slightly. The prickling want that sapped her senses the past few days, ever present under her skin, was beginning to give way to a wealth of calm. A gentle current that seemed to ebb and flow through them all with their quiet inhalation.

There was a slight sorrow that warred with the quiet pride in Solas' eyes, the minute catch in his breath when he stirred, shifting to accept her worried gaze. A careful mask settled in place to conceal it as he told her in hushed reassuring words what she already suspected- her heat had begun to subside. She reached for him, carefully soothing away the hidden worry- it's source didn't matter. She knew the strange respite had to end, but in that moment what came next wasn't as important as what she had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those of you who wished for more, _congratulations_ and also my sincerest condolences. I am writing more and I am absolutely _terrified_ \- There is a reason I haven't ventured into the land of prompts and this comes dangerously close to that. _People have such lovely ideas_. If I were allowed to run amok with them, well, instead of getting the elephant you asked for you'd get an elephant made entirely out of crocodiles. It would probably be a _very_ convincing elephant for a while, but then next thing you know all this hissing and snapping would absolutely give it away.
> 
> There will be ~~one more~~ two more chapters to this, the first is more of the same, but being faced with rejoining the Inquisition- the second is kinda epilougish, fluffy, romancey... _Oh boy only one of those is a real word_. Where I'll tie everything up neat and pretty- And then it'll be continued in the second part of this series set about a year after this one, (primarily so I don't ruin this one - unless I already have). I've written roughly 20k words for it, and I think it's approximately a third of what I intend? Intrigue, angry sentinels, angst, and another mate is added to the mix- much to the anger of a certain someone. Someone who is very busy in the midst of his plans. More plot that one.
> 
> So if you liked this you may not like that, though I suppose that goes without saying.


	4. It made them more

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Mythal's mercy, I love you guys. I'm absolutely tickled that so many of you have enjoyed this, and without all your lovely comments and suggestions this likely wouldn't have happened quite like this. So really, thank _you_ , all of you.
> 
> Also I maybe have been a bit feverish while writing some of this (This was supposed to go up last Saturday for once), and there's a thing- it's probably a _bit_ out of character- but Cole made me do it, and hopefully he makes it plausible. And well, thinking I was dying (I'm probably not). And well... this image I have of Abelas as some sort of accidental Elvhen Fabio (I just cannot shake it, it's terrible. omg. sorry.) 
> 
> And then there's _the_ letter, can you spot all the plant references? I may have an undying love for [Correspondence Interruptus](http://dragonage.wikia.com/wiki/Codex_entry:_Correspondence_Interruptus). 
> 
> Ok I'm done rambling. No wait- [Here's the more NSFW version](https://marevasan-after-dark.tumblr.com/post/147989358739/can-i-just-name-this-pairing-elvhen-glory) of the sketchy art I sorta finished from the last chapter. It's not much but to you I give it freely. <3
> 
> *Varric's Nickname for Revas is Knives, though it was _almost_ Boots.  
>  **Also kinda POV everyone again. Poor Abelas. That's ok, 1st chapter of the next part is all him, probably.

Three days had passed bound to them, and by their quiet calculations perhaps only a day or so of her heat remained. In the absence of the haze, in the clarity of the bonds that held them- her thoughts often ran away, stumbling over the echoes of disdainful words, tripping over anger that hadn't seemed to be truly directed at her, falling firmly in the realm of unease. Trying to reconcile this new picture of them with the old. They seemed to be able to guess her mind, intuitive to the maelstrom of thought that threatened to claim her. Wordless embraces seemed to be the cure to stave off what worried her, and she couldn't refute how effective they were in the distraction that was also an affirmation of their curious change.

Solas frequently ran interference, fetching reports, food and more tea. He claimed it was better that he be seen coming and going… the rumors purportedly already wild enough at the sentinel elf’s display of sweeping her off her feet. _Literally._ Varric supposedly had staked a claim of being first in line to see her when Solas deemed her _"well"_ again. It was enough to coax a genuine laugh from her, their muted surprise at the sound fell short of her own. It had been too long since she had laughed like that and meant it. The sentiment was fleeting, giving way to a growing unease as what faced her sank in- she feared braving the rest of the world once more. It had snuck up on her later on, a slight shock to precisely why that was, that she felt _safe_ with them. She had quietly confessed her revelation as she lay between them, one foot firmly in the Fade, the other hooked around the back of Solas' leg, the unguarded drowsiness was much like the haze that had hindered her better judgement. Their equally quiet responses informed her it was at least in part due to the bond. That it represented a tangible comfort in close proximity, that it could convey small things in quiet moments, dreams could be shared with but a thought and an arousal in one- would catch and burn through them all. But most of all... it meant they were not alone. That she slept soundly after such revelations was far more telling, tentatively comfortable with the arrangement, slowly dropping her carefully crafted walls. It seemed in place of her heat, she was now at their mercy instead- but that no longer seemed like such a bad thing at all.

In Solas' frequent comings and goings it meant Abelas needed to remain, he was her constant quiet companion. She found she didn’t mind, his presence no longer as uncomfortable as it had been several days ago, content in his quiet care.

The evidence of that apparent as she sifted through the formidable mountain of reports while firmly ensconced in Abelas' lap. Neither embarrassed at their persistent state of undress nor bothered by his request that she sit with him. He lightly contained her, his arms wrapped loosely about her waist, his chin resting on her shoulder. Unperturbed by her quiet cursing as she parsed the notes, she was equally as uncaring that he was likely reading them from his vantage point. They were ridiculous things. Correspondence from high and mighty such and such, quoting canticles before subtly segueing into what favor he really wants. She shuffled to the next- A report on troops that were promised for discretely misdirecting some perceived enemy- absent. _Go figure shady lord scumbface wouldn't hold up his end of the bargain._ She tossed it aside, a brief moment of anger as the report looped infuriatingly in the air only to sharply dive back to the pile. _Oh look and another marriage proposal, Leliana was supposed to burn these._

A subtle breathy laugh in her ear startled her, arms that wound tight pulled her from the reports, the expanse of him pressed at her back left her breathless in the rise of lingering heat it cultivated. "I said all that outloud didn't I?"

Abelas nodded against her neck, a hint of a smile in his tone. "You did." He deftly plucked the proposal from her hand, gently subverting her reflex to grab it back. "I wish to see Solas' reaction to this one." She let him steal it, wondering herself what he would make of it before delving back into the pile.

 

He read it several times, attempting to keep his expression neutral, failing as his brows inevitably knitted closer and closer with his growing scowl. The crude words needled at him with each attempt to parse them.

> "My dear Herald of Andraste's undying Grace,
> 
> My Elfroot, the blessing of my Ardor, the locus of the blood that spindles ambrosial need throughout my veins.
> 
> More than a mere political coupling, it would be an affirmation of our love in the Maker's light. Your worship- it is you I would worship. Maker forgive my blasphemy, but you are the divine goddess of his will, and I could ensure every inch of you and your _organ_ ization would feel the direct benefit of taking my hand, and my name in holy gratifying union.
> 
> In my heart you burn. In hushed whispers I will _repeatedly_ champion your just cause.
> 
> -Marquis De Montfort."

He briefly considered that the letter, so conspicuous in its placement, was intended to be discovered by him. For what reason he did not know, though they appeared to be completely distracted by the reports spread out over the covers. Objectively he would have liked nothing more than to write a scathing reply to pick apart everything wrong with the note, but he found he was far from objective on the matter. When he thought they wouldn't notice the letter went up in a flash of smoke, discretely wiping his hands of the ash on the darker fabric of his pants. The sentinel lazily caught his gaze, and a slight grin adorned Revas' face despite her attempt to hide it behind her attention on the reports. It clearly hadn't gone unnoticed.

"What did you make of it?"

"Make of what?"

"I do believe that was a... _'marriage'_ proposal for our mate, was it not?"

His tone flattened at the confirmation of a deliberate baiting. "Was it? It looked to me as nothing more than a rather crude collection of words. Are you quite sure you did not write it? Hmmm, and it seems I have misplaced it. _A pity_."

Revas chuckled, quieting the sentinel's growing retort. His own annoyance at the deliberate trap was soothed by the unmistakable rolling of eyes in her tone. "Oh, that's a shame. And I was so looking forward to responding to _that one_." Her hands fisted in the papers, disarraying what little order could possibly exist in such a system, a quiet plea in her expression grew to a vocal one. "Help me with these? I'd rather not do this all day." He could hardly deny it when put like that, settling in at her side, at ease despite the proximity of the infuriating sentinel.

Before long he'd sussed out some semblance of order in the reports, and coaxed her away from the sentinel into his arms. Quietly debating with himself as he helped her sort papers, a rather large amount of them ending up in the pile marked for the fire- he reasoned that this was a distraction he could afford for the moment. His decisions, his plans needed to wait regardless. And though it had been something he wanted, he grudged Abelas his unexpected offer, asking her to join them without telling her what it meant. He did not approve of the timing, or of accepting her unknowing help. Though a small part of him, larger than he would dare admit, wondered... Considered... _Giving her the truth_. He kept it at bay for the time being, hoping there was still time to think on such things. Her answer, even unknowing had given him a dangerous thing, hope.

 

After the reports were dealt with, sorted and tucked away or burned, they explained lightly how things would change for her now, for them. That while her change in nature carried no known precedent, it should not give rise to any more unexpected _'side effects'_. That though they wouldn't be driven by the inherent need to claim her it was something they both desired continuing. Her poorly concealed relief put his nerves at ease. She listened raptly as the sentinel explained what she could come to expect from them, from herself, from the bond. He quietly followed along, lamenting that the elf seemed to have more knowledge of the positive aspects of such things than he did.

"You will succumb to heat roughly once a year. It will rise much like it did, though the onset may be more sudden. In our presence alone the haze will not return. However, in the presence of one unbound... It will, weaker but still disorienting. That is why such scrutiny came with the first-bonded. They need to be able to protect their mate in all subsequent heats, especially in the presence of unbound potentials. It can be a chaotic process."

She snickered lightly into her hands, curling inward with her amusement. The slight change in posture allowing him to pull her closer. "Yes. Chaotic is a good word for what happened a few days ago." He quietly agreed, though truthfully it still felt chaotic to him. It had been... a _while_ since he had partaken. Not since prideful days adorned his steps. He swore it was once less... less dizzying. That once he'd been in control of such things, down to the rate of his heart rising up to shake his bonds, down to the precise dilation of his eyes. That he'd once kept his mates continually wanting, wielding arousal as well as any weapon. He wondered what had changed, was it simply the weakness he'd woken to? The seductive tug of his mark nestled in her palm? Perhaps it was the weight of the veil, another unintended consequence... or perhaps he was truly that out of practice.

It reached out to embrace him with her sudden soft moan, the lingering call as she shifted uncomfortably in his embrace. _Well_ , practice he could handle.

~~=~~

Her heat ended that day in their shared care. The vestiges of arousal lingered as it waned. Since the rest of the Inquisition had not expected her return for another day- they stayed. Tucked away in the tower, slowly righting the room, making it less obvious what had taken place... in between taking her. He found he didn't wish it to end. The pervasive need that had coursed through him in her heat inexplicably grew in strength as it settled to a disparaging want.

All that remained was facing the rest of the Inquisition, and their rumors.

 

Revas was nervous but determined to face them. They had planned to leave her room discretely, long before dawn, and she would take up her normal routine. Yet, before they departed she was surprised that Abelas took her aside, whispering in her ear that should everything become too overwhelming to seek him out. She smiled her thanks, greatly appreciating the unexpected offer.

Solas appeared in the rotunda as if nothing had changed, planning the next panel of his painting. Ignoring the rude remarks hurled down at him from Dorian. It did nothing to help his concentration that already too easily drifted to where she wandered. Abelas lingered in the garden, meditating, casting hardened looks at anyone who dare disturb him. It was largely successful at keeping people away, save for the curiously incorrigible dwarf, and the scornful stares of the witch.

Idle nobles and petitioners cast mildly intrigued looks her way as she emerged from her tower, heading to the war room with the important reports in hand. Varric caught sight of her across the hall and she lost all thoughts of composure as she hurried to put another door between them.

Her advisors were... Suspiciously Quiet. Cullen went on about troop movements oblivious to the giddy tension in the room as Leliana and Josephine half listened with poorly concealed smirks. And though Morrigan hadn't quite glared at her since meeting Mythal, the woman was distinctly disdainfully curious. And she knew once business was done with she wouldn't escape some sort of questioning.

Cullen had barely slipped out the door, perplexed at the obvious loitering when Leliana started, "So?"

She roughly cleared her throat, "Soooo, _what?"_

Josephine giggled behind her hand, "So tell us about this illness, are you ok? Was it... _Serious_? Are there any, ah lingering complications?"

Morrigan rolled her eyes loudly, a feat she'd not previously thought possible.

"Oh Josie, _really_... It's rude to pry."

"I beg your pardon! I wouldn't know if you hadn't told me!"

They were oblivious to her quietly sinking below the table to hide the mortified blush she couldn't quell.

"Inquisitor? Do you feel faint? Perhaps I should fetch the elven mage for you, or would you rather the sentinel?"

She waved her hand above the table, dismissing Morrigan's goad. "Nope, I'm fine don't mind me." The other two grinning faces came into view as they both peeked around the edge of the table, "Are you certain Inquisitor? You look quite pale." She ran her hands down her face. "I have no doubt I will be quite a bit paler by the time this day is over." She sighed, speaking more to the table than to the two grinning women. "Alright, out with it- what do you know?"

"Oh what don't we know?"

And with that she discovered there had been an occasion in which noises had escaped- muffled moans discernible all the way to the great hall. Though, few had known their true source. She was thankful they had kept the truth of it within the inner circle. Even so she covered up a few of the misconceptions with harmlessly colorful lies, in the very least so that Josephine could do her job. It was not an easy thing to sell that their elven herald had taken not one, but two elven men to bed. And there would be no containing that long- eventually someone else would catch them retiring to her room, even if they were discrete about it. Though, she found herself hoping they wouldn’t be.

"Oh the Marquis will be so disappointed. He's sent marriage proposals at least once a week since the ball hasn't he?"

"Wait, is that the one who grabbed my ass? The one I sorta set on fire a little?"

Josephine chuckled, “I do believe you are correct. He is quite persistent.”

She snorted. “Well, tell him I'm unavailable. My bed is full enough as is.”

The nightingale and the ambassador left, heads bowed chatting amongst themselves. It left her with Morrigan and she could practically feel the witch's gaze at her back as she leaned over the war table. She'd told Leliana and Josephine the watered down safe version, mostly small lies, one of which being that she had been only slightly sick and merely fancied a vacation from reports. It was admittedly a flimsy excuse but the three of them had agreed it best she not mention Solas' age, the fact that she went into heat, their biological differences, or even that the Vir'abelasan had anything to do with it. The fact that Morrigan deigned to endure that embarrassing spectacle meant the woman likely saw right through it.

"What is it like I wonder?" The voice carried less sharply than she expected, turning around to face the woman with her silent inquiry.

"Being bound to my mother? That... Still sounds strange to say."

Tension drained from her with her breath, she leaned back to sit on the edge of the table, contemplating. "Its... Confusing. The voices are _familiar_ , comforting even. Like, a piece of me was missing before. But..."

"But something happened. It changed you did it not? This boring ruse of illness Solas crafted is clearly masking something else."

She nodded, wringing her hands slightly, wondering if she dare confide in the woman. She was, after all, Mythal's daughter. Though whether or not that counted against her or for her she still wasn't sure.

"I would say you should have let me drink from the well, its price was likely intended to be paid by an elf. _Though._.. I am glad I did not." Morrigan paced a few steps closer with a wary eye on the door, "I will say this, If I can claim to know anything of my mother- whatever price she demands of you personally will be something that would amuse her greatly. Be wary. The things that amuse my mother are _not_ always pleasant."

She stared blankly as Morrigan turned and left, the clicking of heels following her down the hall. Wondering what terrible thing that could possibly mean as she finally gave up hiding in the war room. It wouldn't do to become trapped without an exit. Perhaps Abelas would know what this price was.

 

It had been a long day full of snide remarks and thinly veiled knowing looks trailing her steps. It probably didn't help that she pointedly avoided the rotunda and the gardens, despite some subversive attempts by others to try and lead her there anyways. It had not been long before she crossed paths with the eager writer. Much to her surprise Varric had intercepted her simply to ask if she was happy, and she'd told him with some certainty that she thought so. Wondering aloud what else he wished to know, but he simply waved her off, "Oh I'll find out the details eventually, Knives. That was most important, you lot didn't seem to be on the best terms before, _but_ I've seen _stranger things happen._ Maybe I'll bug them for the rest, they look like they need it." He threw her a wink and she shook her head, not envying Solas as Varric slipped into the rotunda.

It was being faced with so much unnecessary meddling that she found herself entrenched in the tavern long before dinner. Hidden away in a darkened corner of the vacant top floor, she sat mulling over the past week in Cole's conspicuous absence. She had meant to pick his mind over the thoughts of others pertaining to the strange arrangement. But perhaps he thought solitude would help more. She wasn't so certain. Though she thought she could handle pretending the past week hadn't happened in the company of others... Even the thought of such quiet sustained indifference during the day just to be chased by passion at night was incredibly tiring. It gave rise to more than a few fanciful daydreams as she waited for the spirit to return.

_"Waiting wanting, what will it mean for us? Will they truly stay? They all look to me. Can they be the ones I look to? A secret that doesn't want to stay a secret. She wants to be taken without turmoil, held away from harm. Live, loved without loss. You _could help her."__

She turned at the unmistakable tone drifting closer, words almost discernible as they grew louder over the din of unruly patrons below, catching sight of the spirit boy ascending the stairs, surprised to see he was followed closely by a half unarmored Abelas. That was... ___Curious_. __ He wore the imposing gilded leg armor, but not the breastplate, nor the pauldrons, not even the gauntlets, just... the light shirt from before. She stared without shame at the statue of a man, still striking in his state of half dress. The sentinel leaned down as Cole whispered words only meant for him. The long braid spilling over his shoulder caught her attention as it dangled invitingly. She watched them closely, wondering what had been divulged and why. Hoping her recent thoughts hadn't made it into the mix- they had been silly and embarrassing. Abelas nodded slowly and Cole fidgeted, casting her an almost apologetic look before flickering away. Abelas was cast in stone as usual as he stepped towards her, silently offering a hand up. She took it, momentarily distracted by the warmth of his palm as hers slid against it, regarding him suspiciously as she stood.

"What was that all about?"

He hummed, and it was, infuriatingly, his only reply as he gazed down at her. A quiet assessing look adorned his features, it managed to draw her in regardless of its distinct distance as he stepped closer, lost in the caress down her neck, the molten glow of his eyes in the dim torchlight.

_It had been a trick._

He swiftly bent down and lifted her with ease, throwing her over his shoulder. "H- _HEY_!! **ABELAS?!** " A small sound of amusement left him, "Your presence has been requested." His arm tightened over the back of her thighs as she tried to dislodge herself. _"What do you think you're doing?!"_ He bounced her lightly, settling her more securely on his shoulder. _"Hmmm,_ I do believe it is called helping."

He headed off for the stairs. "Oh no, no no _don't you dare!_ Abelas you put me down right _now_!" She caught a hold of his braid, a light experimental tug to get his attention. It worked, but not in the way she wished. A light lilting chuckle that carried left him, an abrupt smack without bite landing squarely on her ass. She promptly dropped his braid, covering her face in her hands as he descended the stairs. The other patrons loudly, lewdly began taking notice.

Solas would not approve, but the spirit had found him as he looked for her. Conveying her quiet wish, that she was tired of secrets, did not wish to pretend as if nothing had happened, did not care if it lost her allies. That she firmly felt the end was near and desired to live unhindered while she could- Well, she would not need worry about that any longer. He fought the slight smirk that threatened to surface as he descended the stairs, greeted by the uncivilized uproar of inebriated inhabitants. _"BLEEEGGHH **ELFY**!"_ A soft stream of curses fell from his bonded at the disdainful shout, her relaxation belied her initial objection. Even so, he hoped not to be at the receiving end of her fist once he reached what lay in wait.

He played the part conveyed to him well as he reached the landing, casting a fierce gaze at any who would dare challenge his claim. Not missing the dwarf that had bothered him earlier watching raptly, nor the large qunari making up more than half the din. His exit suddenly barred by the peacock Mage, "A moment if you don't mind." He paused as the man drifted around to face his woman, hushed words spoken he couldn't hear. A lyrical laugh fell from her, and he felt the smile within it she couldn't contain despite her embarrassment. "Shut up Dorian. That's incredibly rude. He felt her hands brace against his back as she leveraged herself up slightly. _**"You're all incredibly rude!"** _ He finally broke into a smirk, locking eyes with the openly incredulous dwarf. Shuttering the expression, he hefted her to resettle her weight over his shoulder as he strode into the courtyard. More than a few drunken patrons following in his wake.

The mild uproar followed his silent path, an astonished blushing dark haired woman promptly skirted out of his way as he strode into the great hall, lingering nobles affecting various ridiculous looks of intrigue and scandalized expressions to match their equally ridiculous adornments.

"Cassandra, a little help here?"

He spoke low, punctuated by a light reminder against the curve of her ass. "You are in need of no help save mine."

 _"Inquisitor?_ It... Ah looks to me like you have everything under control."

The amusement the woman's tone conveyed was as satisfying as the loud scoff that echoed in answer.

He crossed the length of the hall, easing open her door- carefully backing inwards as he pulled it shut. "You are a wicked man you know that?"

He nodded, "I am aware."

"And what exactly was the purpose of this?"

He set off up the stairs, "You will see."

"Did you carry her the entire way?"

He nodded, quietly delighting in the defeated disapproval that faced him. The wolf dragging a hand down his face, "Of course you did."

He shrugged lightly, unsettling his quarry, "Compassion seemed to think it was an appropriate notion. I could not find a reason to disagree." Revas groaned loudly.

"Will one of you kindly tell me what in the void this is all about?"

"You did not tell her?"

"I thought it was intended to be a surprise."

He chuckled lightly as her fists beat against his back, "Tell me what?!" He finally relented in his grasp, letting her slide down his chest to her feet. Pleased at the heated blush that suddenly kept her indignation at bay. He gently turned her around to see what they had arranged for her. A low round table placed in front of the fire, laden with wine and an assortment of food.

" _Oh_...? What is all this?"

"The end of a heat was traditionally celebrated with a feast for all who participated. A celebration of joined lives."

Solas nodded as he stepped closer, taking up her hands in his, "However, since it is just us. We assumed a more, intimate affair would be sufficient."

She chuckled, leaning back against him. "You two are ridiculous." Her false severity broke into a wide grin as she looked up at him. _"And I love it."_

They ate at ease, leisurely, trading plates of food for wine. Lamenting freely the attentions that plagued them all throughout the day. He noticed she had a fondness for wine, her animated descriptions of the trials she faced during the day growing more elaborate with each measured sip. Solas' eyes grew hooded, the elf's gaze rarely leaving her as a heavy blush crept up his ears. The inebriated wolf leaned in slowly and whispered in her ear. The blush promptly spread to Revas, she nodded slowly with a wry grin. Gears caught and spun as she gathered the confidence to reply to whatever the man had said. "I have something I would like to try." She whispered back and the wolf lost his carefully tended composure, sobered in seconds, breath hitched with widened eyes. The man caught his gaze, leaning in as the wolf haltingly whispered to him what she wished, and what he wished him to do to her. A slow grin slid into place at the request. _It seemed wine made her bold indeed._

They made a show of mutual care once more, bathing, massaging, coaxing relaxation amidst them all. _This_ had been something he had looked forward to. During heat foreplay was not necessary, usually ending up as a hindrance and little more than a tease. But now... Now they could _indulge._

Abelas coaxed her to kneel over his face, guiding her to rest most of her weight on her heels, her thighs parted wide. Her blush burned brightly, covering her eyes with her hand every time she caught the sentinel's gaze between her legs. She relented on her own, adjusting to the newness of the request as the sentinel slowly stroked her form. Solas lay back against the headboard, slightly adjusting the pillows behind him. Wishing he knew what to do with his hands, folding them lightly over his chest, he was already more than hard enough at the thought of what she wished to do. It took effort to fight the shiver at her light touch, her fingers trailing down his cock as she leaned over him. His words came out far breather than he wished.

"Are you sure you wish to do this Revas? It is not necessary."

She grinned at him, her eyes locked to his as she dipped lower. He watched with growing anticipation as her tongue darted out to lave the tip of his cock, placing a kiss there before the full bow of her lips parted to accept him, gently sucking on the tip as he gasped.

She withdrew to answer him more fully and he missed the heat of her enveloping him. "I am quite sure Solas." A shaky breath shuddered from him as she made herself more comfortable. A startled moan left her as Abelas caressed her in ways he couldn't see. Then she shuddered briefly upward and he saw the long lick the man gave her. A soft oath loosed in Elvhen as the sentinel quickly repeated the gesture firmly unsettling her focus.

Her forearms braced on his thighs, her hands slid down his length in one smooth stroke, palms settling over the slight bulge at the base, she interlocked her fingers as she pressed tight. The soft sounds that left him only grew louder as her mouth enveloped him once more. Her head bobbed in shallow thrusts, her tongue pressed down the underside of his shaft, and then she met his gaze through her lashes. He bit his lip hard as his knot began to swell, fisting his hands in the covers at his side. A long moan tore through her sending the vibration of it straight through him. Her hands clamped tight around his growing knot. She thrust downwards lightly tugging at it as the head of his cock brushed the back of her throat. It took effort to keep from thrusting upward, to keep his hips still. She should have tied him down. Her grip on the bulge relented slightly as it finally swelled to completion, adjusting as she cupped it, hollowing her cheeks as she sucked hard on his length before pressing down, he hit the back of her throat once more, and she _re-angled_ he cried out as he slid down her throat her lips meeting the bulge. She held it for a few seconds as he began to throb, withdrawing to catch a breath. He couldn't catch his, his heels digging into the mattress, his body tensed, reaching up to grab the headboard as she began to massage his knot. He could hardly believe what she was doing to him but he could not gather the will to stop her. He needed _more_. Her palms alternated pressure to simulate the clench of release around the knot. Her tongue swirled against his shaft placing pressure as she sucked, quickly drawing a desperate moan from him. She looked up as he swelled, throbbed, the profound ache reached up to take him, a knowing look made its home in her eyes as she took a deep breath. "NO-Ah- _ **AHHN** -NNNGHH" _She took him deep as he came clenching her hands tightly as he spilled down her throat, swallowing around him again and again as his seed pulsed forth. His hips stuttered against his will as she kissed his knot, she held him deep as he shook, his fingers painfully gripping the headboard, his head thrown back- _it was too much._ A tight squeeze of her hands brought his eyes back to her as she looked at him wrought with fire, fierce and wildly demanding his observance, tears beginning to stream from her eyes.

He cried out, _in desperation_ , as the pulse finally ended, and she sat up quick coughing, drawing in a deep breath as a trail of his spend flowed down her chin. She moaned long and low, followed by a short cry as she shuddered over Abelas, the sentinel's hands gripping her thighs tightly to quell her rut. Her hands still gripping him tight as she met his gaze in the midst of her release, and he was frozen at the sight of her, her tongue darting out to lick up his seed, the satisfied grin she leveled him with as she swallowed the last of it.

_He had not expected her to take him so far._

The next wave built as she began to lean down, "No." She paused with a look of confusion, "No? Was that not-" he cut her off, "Abelas." The man seemed to understand, withdrawing from between her thighs, pulling her away. Her confusion marred by arousal as he gently wrest his length from her- waiting only until Abelas was settled with her at his side before he pounced, pinning her up against the sentinel. Eyes widened in more than arousal, she cried out as Abelas slowly sank into her, as he quickly hilted himself to the start of his knot deep within her well slicked heat. A trembling moan adorned her lips as he pressed against her. "S-solas, I don't think it can-". He kissed her delving to accept her moan, tasting himself on her tongue, rocking his knot against her. Abelas held her close, held her still. Whispering soft reassurance in her ear. "Relax for us Revas. It will fit, we will not hurt you."

He brought his hand between them casting several spells in quick succession, to coat himself, to slightly compress the knot, to make his passage more manageable. He broke off the kiss as he held her down, he could feel the pulse building to release. She cried out as he pressed inwards, slowly forcing her wide around the bulge. She arched between them and he whispered soft praise against her throat, gripping her shoulders to thrust her against him, she slowly gave way. The feel of her moan as he nipped her throat was nothing to the feel of his knot gripped tight by her entrance. He thrust forcefully working it deeper as she began to fall apart beneath him, she flexed with her release and he groaned as she suddenly accepted him, the wild rebellion of her body in full orgasm trapped by them heralded his undoing. He pressed firmly holding his hips to hers as he spilled, throbbing potently with each spurt. His teeth clenched against the sensation that pulled him from himself and he lost all control. Thrusting hard in quick short juts of hips, he claimed her completely, brutally her fingers digging trails down his back as she screamed his name. _HIS name_. The shudder of her form around him was all that could exist here. He bit lightly into the soft skin of her shoulder as his release waned and Abelas' began, keeping her still as she melted in their embrace. His teeth released her as he came down, shakingly weak, panting as he brought his forehead to hers.

"It was unlike anything... _Anything_ I have felt."

A shaky laugh left her, "Was it really that good?"

He nodded against her, "Good doesn't even begin to describe it."

Long since sobered by their efforts, she lay drunk on them instead. Contentment filled her as well as they still did. Sleep threatened to claim her as deftly as their fingers, soothing strokes trailing her edges. Heated promises whispered in her ear, fixed a smile on her lips. Then a cold breeze pebbled her sweat soaked skin and filled her with disproportionate dread. Her whispered reply ensured she wasn't alone in that, rueful groans rising up in tandem.

"You two forgot to close the balcony doors."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I split this chapter in two, 10k seemed a bit much for one and it divided rather nicely. I wasn't happy with this and I just kept writing and writing and well, now there's two chapters and I think it's better for it.
> 
> It'll be up soon- probably before you even read this, not really smutty, but fluffish, epilogue-y.
> 
> I don't know what to call this, Ex-SexGod!Solas?
> 
> (Ugh I kinda hate my chapter titles. Might rename them? Maybe. Also this has been in editing forever and I still feel like there are inconsistencies, keep an eye out and I'll fix it.)


	5. An end that isn't an end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this will be a bit vignette-y, spanning a month or so- perhaps a bit more. So it'll probably read like they're moving real fast, and truthfully they are- but it's a bit more 'over time' than it probably looks. Also two out of three are distinctly terrified of what will come next so there's a bit of mostly unmentioned desperation in their motives.

They shared her bed, she ignored the rumors- now only grown in magnitude at his display in the tavern, their passionate sounds that drifted far on the cold night air, and that the two of them had been often seen retiring to her room for the night. He suspected the wealth of rumors themselves as well as his own constant presence at her side made it a certain occurrence that Solas joined them. Rather than lay in the rotunda where questions were fair game, and rather than let her be swayed by another- the wolf sought the solitude of their tower. Her bed was certainly big enough. He knew the man remained conflicted where Revas was concerned, and he was glad to see Solas spending more time with her. Knowing it wouldn't make what he had to do easier, but the wolf needed it, needed her, needed the reminder that his choices bore consequences.

Idleness was not something he was accustomed to, the last several ages of his life consumed by purpose, duty. The wolf eased up on his plotting as the man settled into enjoying the respite they'd won. It left him without much to occupy his time, it left him... Bored. The wolf had taken to shooing him off, so he'd taken to following Revas around during the day, watching her- assessing her, sometimes discretely... Other times ... Not so. His indiscretion had started with a look, she'd spotted him while some man- best described as a potted plant on fire cornered her in the gardens. She looked less than pleased to find herself at the receiving end of what was surely an enthralling conversation. He'd considered letting his quiet amusement of her plight continue until she rectified the situation herself, but for that look fleetingly shot his way. Quietly _pleading_ , wide-eyed, open. It pulled him from his distance, leaving the shadowed arch, striding to silently still at her back. The potted plant ceased speaking as he wound his arms around her, fixing ostentation made manifest with a reproving glare as he settled his chin atop her head. The conversation ended rather quickly at that point, and she had managed to keep him busy ever since. Allowing her to tactically wield his presence, it was endlessly amusing to her and he found he didn't mind. It soon gave rise to an understood indication of his presence, they left her alone when he appeared at her side, and he found he minded that even less.

His duty to the wisdom she carried was what had brought him, yet it was no longer entirely why he lingered. He had thought she would have misused it, or been unable to understand it at all, he had rarely been so wrong. In their distance, the wolf's reasoning that she needed to figure it out on her own first before interference, he had been impressed with how well she adapted to the burden. There was much she needed to learn, much he could help her with, yet regardless she picked up the tongue of their people quick. Listening often, intently for the voices that spoke to her, she would often practice with them as they secluded themselves in her room. Telling them both about her life before in words that were familiar, he couldn't help but reciprocate, knowing Solas couldn't, though the man played along in his own way.

It came as no surprise to him when Solas said it first. Words whispered in her ear as they lay in a tangle on the edge of dreams. _"Ar lath ma vhenan."_ He buried his smile in her hair as she responded in kind.

He watched her often, and she seemed not to mind. A small tug in his chest when she would look up from her work, a small smile. He knew Solas felt the same. He hadn’t realized how close she had been to throwing her life away on the premise of duty.  It was an excuse whose familiarity lay uncomfortably close to his heart. But now… there was a vibrance to her, she carried a careful hope once more. It seemed all she needed was to know she wasn't alone. He wondered how it was that fate worked in such ways, binding them all in that common need. They were stronger together than they had ever been alone.

She had grown delightfully embarrassed all over again as they courted her. Small gestures when she least expected it. Wild roses, poetry snuck into her stack of reports, a kiss pressed to her fingers when they crossed paths in the company of others, passionate embraces in deserted hallways. It wasn't called of her by traditions long forgotten, yet she reciprocated in her own way. Small cakes lifted from the kitchens while they were still warm, hours spent hidden in the undercroft between lengthy meetings forging small things, ornate daggers, cloaks, gloves. She even managed to pull some strings to procure an ancient vintage of wine that very nearly mirrored one they remembered. They cherished her tokens of affection, they cherished her.

The snow fell in lazy whirls around her, face fixed on the tempestuous mix of darkened clouds and slate grey sky. Undeterred by the occasional antithetical boom of thunder, he ceased his watch to appear at her side. Walling himself around her, simply to catch a breathless laugh, to guess if the hue on her cheeks could be blamed more on the cold or his effort. He finally spoke with confidence his own declaration _"Ar lath ma, Emm'asha, ma Revas."_   His heart swelled as she smiled, reaching up to kiss him as she spoke to him in kind, _"La ar lath ma Abelas, ma vhenan'ara."_

She had found a confidence that she'd been missing since accepting the burden of the Vir'abelasan. Though, the stories had apparently lost her a few minor allies. She'd laughed it away in a manner she could not have done before. Her amusement particularly sharp about the one noble who'd entertained thoughts of proposal. Waving away the concerns of the others that someone who was supposed to be representing the chantry was participating in _"Hedonistic heathen debauchery, angering the Maker, and bringing his wrath down upon us."_ Her dramatic reading complete with elaborate gestures had provoked a quiet laugh from him. It only served to further encourage her. She had joked of framing that one and setting it over the fireplace.

He'd settled in one evening to realize she'd actually done it. His chuckle had drawn her attention, and a mischievous grin surfaced when he'd pointed it out.

Though her heat had ended, they still claimed her often. He was intermittently content to let Solas take her alone, knowing the man as he did... His time with her would be limited in the near future. And she still took the bitter tea with a grimace, waving off their concern at the slight risk now that she was no longer in heat. "A risk is a risk, even if it's remote. Besides, if either of you got me with child like hell would I let you tuck me away somewhere safe. You're stuck with me. So it's _this_ ," she waved the mug at them, "Or dealing with me carrying your child in a warzone. Because based on my luck, as soon as I stop taking this you'll get me with twins." He couldn't help but smile at her tenacity as well as the arc of the empty cup as it rode at the mercy of her animated gestures. Though he wondered what kind of change she would write upon them if she did grow heavy with child. He caught Solas' wistful gaze before the man shuttered the expression. Knowing he wondered the same, and clearly it was something the wolf would desire, if the world wasn't what it was.

He hadn't thought about what it would mean to her at first, yet none of her companions gave her too much trouble over their _'strange'_ arrangement, though the same could not be said for himself and the wolf. All could see the change that had been wrought in her. Even the beleaguered ambassador came around when faced with the fire that had become of Revas. The odd dwarf had put it in a particularly accurate if not exceptionally crude manner. "She's held herself to the grindstone for so long she completely lost her shape. Good for her, really. If anyone deserves to be happy it's her." A painfully exaggerated wink, and a rude slap on the shoulder later- "So don't you two break her _bending_ her back into shape." He was aware there was now a bet making the rounds on his loss of composure. That remark had almost coaxed a smile out of him against his will. "So, Shiny are you up for a game of wicked grace?"

"Shiny?"

"Not my best, _I know_ , but sparkles sounded too much like sparkler. And don't get me started on broody. You elves and your moods."

He'd declined, intending to retire to their room for the night, though it didn't quite go as planned.

Even shared as she was- he recognized what Solas was about to do, he had walked in on a rare private moment. He lingered on the stairs, watching quietly through the railing. They stood close in the darkened room, the balcony doors thrown wide, the brisk air lightly fluttering the curtains. No light but of the moons reflecting palely off the glacial slopes, lending the room an almost ethereal quality. It seemed Solas had thought long on this, and it hardly felt as though they were anywhere but under the naked stars themselves. Revas slowly nodded, and Solas raised his palms to cast his spell. _"Ar lasa mala Revas_ , would that I could free you entirely." The green glow abated for but a second before a handful of small magelights floated upward to illuminate the swift embrace before him. A breathy declaration, "Beautiful." Abelas smiled at the small moan that fell from her lips as the man set about claiming her. Easing the door back open, knowing Solas wished to take her alone, he slipped back out into the fortress. Perhaps he would take the dwarf up on his offer after all. It would give them a few hours and they would need all the time they could get.

 

Solas had wanted to take her elsewhere, mulled over a thousand suitable places- too many that likely no longer existed as he remembered, as the Fade remembered. The grove was one of the few he had seen firsthand to know of its fate, and one of the only to survive unmarred by the ravages of time, _but there was no time_... He recognized the deep breath for what it was, the lull would soon end bringing with it the turmoil of unknown. The creature would not stay idle. But he could still do this for her. Perhaps it was fitting that he free her from the summit of his mistake. She who healed the veil from the seat of its making, she who healed him.

He wasn't sure he was ever going to get used to being at the mercy of the woman that had so easily made off with his heart. His pulse captured firmly within her as she sat over his lap, joined to him. The small circles drawn only with her hips drew ever larger noises from him. The heated look that graced her failed to mask her rapt fascination of his undoing. He rocked upwards into her, chasing that exquisite weakness as she willingly took all he had to give. Barefaced, beautiful, her fingers trailed his spine, his curled over the back of each shoulder. As if she was just as free to leave him wanting, as if he needed to subdue her, as if she wasn't already locked securely to him. He never wanted to let this go.

And then she moaned his name.

Pride became a prayer, a plea, a desperate wish as she shuddered in his arms. Her focus waned, and it was...

_It was what he wanted._

His name from her lips made him lighter, his name that was not a burden. The statement of the simple truth of himself transformed into a loving oath. He gave himself to her, and weakness claimed him with no shred of guilt, no pain as he spilled within her.

Revas became his pride. The lone spirit that disproved everything he had thought was truth, the one answer- if she could exist, maybe it had not been a mistake.

Abelas returned shortly after they had finished, washed, and reconvened in whispers of touch, swathed in little more than moonlight, lying wrapped tight around one another in the aftermath of their release. The heavy clinking of metal drew their curiosity. The sentinel smirked holding up a sizable bag of coins in one hand and an odd assortment of clothing in the other. His heart snorted, "Varric finally convinced you to play Wicked Grace? I bet he won't make that mistake again." Abelas chuckled, "No, I bet not."

 

Barefaced, bright eyed, Solas hadn't noticed it before. The subtle stubborn lines that had been hidden by her vallaslin, fleeting expressions of annoyance whenever a passing scout called her by title. Though, perhaps it was more to the uncertainty in their voices at the liberation of her markings. It was endearing, another quiet side to the woman who felled mountains in her fury. She drifted at his side, her hand tucked around his arm, his settled over hers, letting him lead her around the battlements. Spelled heat trailing a slight fog in their wake, he may have decreased its area of influence slightly. Privately grinning as she huddled closer to him. Their steps crunched lightly over the newly fallen snow, their words whispered only for them. It had taken convincing, and perhaps more than a little bribery to secure her company so early in the morning, as well as to ensure Abelas slept in. Though he had to admit, the sentinel had been unusually cooperative with him lately, he would need to dwell on that... _later_.

For now his focus remained on his heart. Answering what questions he could, asking what questions he dared. Trying to paint a better picture of her. Trying to guess how she might react to what he hid, inadvertently painting himself at her side.

The steps descending into the garden were slick, less travelled as the soldiers made their rounds. A sharp tug pulled him from his thoughts as she slipped on the second landing. Her step went wide sending her scrambling for purchase, pulling him with her despite his attempt to steady them both.

She gazed up at him, winded but grinning. He'd braced himself over her, landing squarely on top of her, much to her amusement and less to his. Perhaps he should have followed Abelas' suggestion of a relaxing bath instead. "Are you alright vhenan?" She pulled at his coat, attempting to bring him against her, he resisted despite her pout. The spelled warmth beginning to melt the icy stone beneath them, but not before he took in the dark sky of her hair haloed about her, new snowflakes clinging to life as stars. She huffed, ruining the otherworldly effect only slightly with her exasperation. "Oh I'm fine, I do this at least once a week." She chuckled lightly, searching his gaze, "You on the other hand... are you okay Solas? Based on that look you haven't fallen like this in _ages_. Wouldn't want you to pull something."

He snorted quietly, shaking his head at the obvious jab at his age. It would be unwise to indulge, yet... his hands shifted to settle his weight on his elbows, he found himself already sinking against her to draw her into a kiss. The melting ice began to soak into their clothes with a chill, but nothing had ever mattered less to him.  His lips met hers lovingly, with all the heat of his spell- though he'd ceased maintaining it. The heat she kindled in him was more than sufficient. Her fingers trailing the edge of his ears, her foot trailing up the back of his thigh, he deepened the kiss. Tongue swiped tongue sedately- their own quiet language broken only with her soft moan. A quiet scoff from the foot of the stairs had him looking sidelong at the disturbance, a chantry mother. He pressed himself firmly against his heart, coaxing a louder moan for him to swallow before breaking off the kiss. Pressing a small apologetic kiss to the end of her chilled nose before he shifted to stand, taking both her hands to pull her up. Steadying her as they descended the rest of the stairs, given a wide berth by the red and white flock once they realized who she was, he finally answered her question, "You are correct Revas. I have not fallen like this in ages." She caught his meaning, his chest filled with echoes of her light laugh, her smile. The sensation buoyed him against the cold damp of their clothes and the lingering soreness from their abrupt descent as he led her back inside. He was now _certain_ he'd pulled something and there was surely a hot bath with their name on it.

 ~~=~~

He felt at peace with their arrangement. It was decidedly dangerous and tempting to forget himself, his duty in the comfort she offered. How quickly she claimed his heart, how quickly he claimed hers. It had once been a foolish desire- to see it come true was not something he had ever expected. Yet he reveled in waking next to her. Her face bare, her fade softened expression still tinged with the passionate dreams they shared. He had shared much with her, yet despite her acceptance of what he offered- he couldn't bring himself to share everything, not yet. He feared the inevitable expression that his words would give rise to. Pain, fear... He imagined regret would hurt the worst. Abelas had urged him to confide in her. The sentinel had faith she would agree to help them even knowingly. He couldn't carry such a faith, not until he had the power to show her. To do it wrong would only increase the hurt to be proven a false hope. Yet as she slept between them so soundly, the nightmares long since kept at bay, the heat of her heart warming him... He could pretend, fantasize about her acceptance. Mull over the multitude of scenarios in which she might take his revelation in stride. She had met a so called God, been bound to her, she'd accepted his age... Surely to discover his other name would not be such a leap? Perhaps when he left... she would leave with him. It would be better that it came from him, he wondered if Abelas would divulge his secret to her against his wish. Whether he did or not, he knew he would have to confront it eventually. The anchor would only last so long.

He sighed, pushing the past away to pull her closer. Stilling as she nuzzled in, "Mmmhr Solas, it's too early to be thinking so loudly." Quieted, he wondered how she guessed. She pulled back, lightly unsettling the sleeping sentinel, blinking blearily attempting to search his expression, “You don't know you do it do you?”

 _What? What had he done? Had he spoken under his breath?_ He wracked his brain briefly before shakily asking, “Do… what?”

Her hand left his hip to rest atop his hand at her waist. "When you're deep in thought you draw little shapes with your fingers."

He chuckled quietly, immensely relieved, “I was not aware, if it bothers you-”  
“It doesn't.” She wrapped her arms back around him, pressing her nose to his neck. When he felt her smile slowly bloom against his pulse he finally let his thoughts drift away.

 

She had long since grown accustomed to waking firmly sandwiched between the two serious elves. Abelas slept so silently, his severe facade relaxed, his arm thrown low across her waist. He always slept curled at her back, ever the protector. Solas preferred to sleep face to face, literally. She usually woke pressed flat up against him, his arm over hers draped up and over Abelas as well. With either his brow pressed to hers, or interlocked with his ear pressed to the pulse at her neck. The thunderous beat of his heart in hers often managed to lull her back to sleep amid the soft snores that fell from him. It was utterly charming how the two of them had grown on her. Abelas and his wayward compliments, sweet gestures that belied his stern expression, Solas and his surprising depth of passion, thoughtfulness that was unmatched by any other.

The mix of their scent lingered to her even without the heat, inhaling it deeply, she reveled in the calm it bestowed. She had mentioned it once in passing, and they had been surprised that she would still notice. Explaining that being bonded was written deep, their scent had changed, marked by hers, as hers had been marked by theirs. It was still intoxicating to her and it served as a clear indication to anyone of their kin that they were spoken for.

She loved them both, dearly, her strange lovers. Her heart split in two- willingly given, the pieces of themselves they gave her in return filled the void and made her whole once more. And she knew, in the back of her mind they couldn't wake like this forever. Yet wherever they ended up, she hoped somehow it would be okay.

 

He woke occasionally in the night, not used to being at such peace, not used to being allowed to let down his guard. The path back to dreams was as simple as finding the back of her neck, wrapping his arms tighter, inhaling her scent marked by his.

When he woke next it was to his arms empty, a lingering warmth. An arm wound around his back, a form pressed close. He pulled himself closer, grasping for sleep once more. He was promptly shaken awake by a hysterical laugh and a low stream of curses. Opening his eyes abruptly to find the wolf seething in his arms, fighting his embrace while Revas sat on the edge of the bed, shaking with a laugh she couldn't contain. "I only got up for a minute!" Solas planted both hands on his chest, attempting to break his tightening hold. "It is too late, you lost your spot." Solas hissed at him, a spark of flame at his fingertips. He promptly freed the man with a rolling chuckle. "You started it."

"I'll _**finish it**_ as well if you _ever_ **dare** do that again."

Revas snorted, gracelessly sliding off the edge of the bed to the floor, laughing without restraint. He could not help but enjoy such a lighthearted sound. While Solas rolled over, nursing his wounded pride he shuffled to the edge of the bed, peering over at his woman curled up on the floor, clutching her stomach with the shaking laugh. Her tear streaked face met his gaze for a moment before her amusement renewed, making her attempted retort almost incoherent. "The- look- on-your- _faaace!_ You-two-" she shook her head, _"Adorable."_

He chuckled lightly, leaning over the edge to drag her back up.

It was perhaps that most of all he enjoyed, her boundless mirth. His people rarely succumbed to such wealth of emotion. It took her quite some time to calm down, captured firmly in his embrace and it took even longer after that for the wolf to rejoin them. He found sleep once more with a smile on his lips to match the one that grew in his heart.

~~=~~

The peace that had grown between them wasn't shattered with the sky. She didn't even need to ask, they stayed at her side as they rode hard to the source of the calamity, to where it all began. Never more than a step from her while the ground itself sought to separate them, rising up at the will of the creature that tried to tear her down. She didn't need to look, didn't need to drop her gaze from Corypheus to know their barriers lay over her skin, their backs facing hers, their spells enhancing hers. Even after her hand knit the sky anew, after the orb that felt... _familiar_ firm in her grasp- handed down judgement upon the wayward magister, even after the ground fell out from beneath them- she knew they remained. Two pairs of hands grabbed her, forms shielding hers, barriers cast as they plummeted. She woke knowing they lived, somehow knowing one hurt, knowing she couldn't fix what lay broken in his hands.

“There's more… isn't there?”

He nodded slowly against his will, setting down the pieces. Daring her to ask. Terrified, knowing he'd answer this time if she did.

She didn't.

His walls slowly regenerated as he stood, raising up the weight of the burden that suddenly felt like a crushing force against him. It was all wrong. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. He could already feel his hope, his picture of the future, a future with her at his side slipping away. He couldn't stay, not like this. Not so broken, not so weak. If he couldn't show her she would never understand. Better she curse him for what she thought he was, than misunderstand the truth and curse him for what he must do.

He made his choice, bitter though it was.

She gazed at him deeply unsettled... the expression he wore, the pain he presented written plainly, felt as though she was about to watch something die... the shattered orb had hurt him- she knew deep down something had just gone horribly wrong. The light in his eyes expired slowly in the silence that hung between them. He was... _leaving_. She offered him a small watery smile trying her best to hide the pain of the realization before turning away as the others called out her name. Not looking back, knowing it would make it easier on him- even though it only made it harder for her.

He breathed a pained sigh that caught sharply in his chest, watching her go perhaps a moment too long, longing to follow if only to try to heal that sadness she wore too well. He caught Abelas' gaze, silently attempting to convey everything he could. He needed to protect her, she was a rare spirit- _and losing her..._ The man nodded meaningfully and he accepted his path, turning to go before he couldn't.

He watched the wolf go, knowing what he asked. He wouldn't part from her, not now. It was more than duty, to Solas, to the well, to her... She had laid claim to both their hearts, and they to her's. He would keep her safe for her path would not be an easy one, and neither would his. It was a setback, a small failure to temper the wolf, but there was still time. He rolled his shoulders before setting off after her, this fight was over- but the danger would never be.

Her hand found his as they walked back to the ruins of Haven, leading the tired and listless who had assisted them during the fight. And he could feel the tremble of her fingers even through the layers of his gauntlet. He stopped, tipping her chin to read the expression she wished to hide. Unsure if it was the sudden departure of Solas, or the grueling fight she had just ended. Absently healing the cut on her brow, wishing such a spell existed to heal that wounded look, she released her bitten lip to speak. "Are you-" He swiftly ended that inquiry, "No. I am not going anywhere." He swept her up without a thought, hands bracing her armored thighs as she wrapped them around his waist, her arms thrown around his neck. Holding her tight against his breastplate, he resumed the long walk to where they left their mounts. She cried quietly in his arms, "It's over, it's finally _over_. I-I never thought I w-would _survive_." He let her continue, held but unhindered. Hers was a grief that needed to run its course.

It was a long journey back, the pace more sedate in the absence of looming threat. He rode at her side, or she by his, a quiet reflection of his silence unlike her companions who ranged from thoughtless banter to chatty exuberance. He watched her, wondering what it was that consumed her thoughts. The others skirted around mention of their missing companion, whispering to each other their speculations.

"HEY Sparkles, is everything alright?"

"What reason could you _possibly_ have for shouting at me? _I'm right here!"_

"No, not you Dorian-"

"No... _You didn't_ -You nicknamed him..."

"SPARKLES?"

" _ **Ahahahaheheheeeeh**_!! How d'you like that elfy? SPAARKLES!! _Grand that is_."

He rolled his eyes in silent indignity as the rest of them weighed in on his apparent change in namesake. Revas turned in her saddle, catching his gaze. The wan smile on her face made it worth it. "Knives and Sparkles, I like it."

"Your nickname is Knives?"

She nodded, slowing her mount to better match the lazier pace of his own.

"Well you see... The craftsman of my clan had died, and we scrounged for three years without a suitable replacement. In that time blades broke, couldn't be repaired, so all available bladed weapons went to those that hunted, those that protected our clan."

"So, I had a habit... Back in Haven, I would pocket the cutlery, or daggers that looked abandoned. Really anything with a sharp edge." She chuckled lightly, gazing up at the sky. "I had no clue what I was doing, closing rifts, following orders, making decisions that felt way above me. All I wanted was to collect weapons and send them to my clan."

He spoke softly, reluctant to tread on her memory, "Did you?"

She sighed softly, "Well I was discovered, and more substantial weapons were sent to them discretely. Anyways, the missing blades hadn't gone unnoticed and Varric suspected me. He ambushed me one night at my cabin under the premise of teaching me wicked grace. He spotted my rather sizable cache of weapons under my bed, and well... The nickname grew on me. He almost changed it once we reached Skyhold, worried it was too close to 'knife-ear', it didn't bother me though, so it stuck."

"It seemed fitting, though a little insulting. I always wanted to be a scout, you know? Wielding blades, running branch to branch never setting foot on the ground. But- magic, lore, stories... They took precedence."

He watched her deflate a little further, the unseeable weight of memory slowly bowing her back. Her exhaustion was obvious. They would have to find a place to camp soon, but for now...

"I will teach you."

Disbelief gave way to a wild grin as she snapped upright to face him. "Really?" He nodded, unable to keep the smile from surfacing and unwilling to try.

"I would like that."

 

The first night it became clear just how far the wolf had stepped away. Unreachable in dreams, it upset her, understandably though she quieted to unsettled acceptance after he allayed her fears, they were still bound and the man still lived. It worried him more than he dare admit. Things had not gone as planned, and his knowledge of what the wolf might do next was limited. He buried it deep as he clung to her in the night, not wanting it to bother her as well.

The fortress appeared to already be well into celebration. The... ‘Advisors’... Waiting at the gate amid subtly inebriated nobility and soldiers obviously so. They stood on the barest of ceremonies, his bonded dispensing with much, stating quietly that while she was tired it shouldn't stop the rest of them. As soon as they had a moment alone she had tugged at his mantle to whisper her aggravation in his ear what he couldn't help but notice, they had clearly been celebrating long before they had known of their collective wellbeing. It was a fact the peacock mage and the dwarf seemed to openly notice as well. He drifted at her side, quiet, nearly unnoticed by others as she rounded the great hall, briefly checking in on they who requested her attention. Leaning against him long before the night was through, she quietly met his gaze, a small plea there that he could oblige. He had no guilt in being the reason for her absence, picking her up, striding across the hall amidst fervent whispers and bawdy shouts. Closing doors firmly behind them, setting her free only once they were hidden away in the tower once more.

The silence stretched as he shed his armor, as she shed hers, their missing bondmate obvious in his absence. No careful observances as they dressed more comfortably, no cutting remarks, no whispered tactics for the evening, just tired yawns, and the sound of metal relinquishing its grasp as their battle-stained walls fell away. He watched as she wandered to the balcony, leaning against it deep in her preoccupied thoughts, wondering what move she would choose to make.

It was almost magnetic how he drifted out to meet her, sliding his arms around her. It was so easy to rest his chin atop her head as he had done many times, shielding her from all but the new day steadily on the rise. He took comfort in the way she leaned back against him, a soft sigh more evident in the fall of her chest, in the small frozen cloud drifting upwards to catch the light than the slight sound. They stood like that for what could have been years, save for the sun barely risen to adorn the frozen vista in fiery hues of warning. It seemed they were fortunate in their timely arrival, a storm was imminent.

"I... Wish to leave as well, soon. This place was never truly mine." She turned in his embrace to face him, "Would… you want to come with me?" A small smile rose to reach his eyes as slowly as the rising sun, soaking in that tenuous hope in her voice, a small fear he could banish. "I would." Her responding smile outshone the morning and he knew then- he would chase it’s light horizon to horizon so long as she let him. "Do we have to go after Solas?" He considered her question, unsure of the right answer in spite of the man's plans. The failure to reclaim his foci upset everything. "It is not a requirement, but... I think it would be prudent. He is... _Troubled_." A small laugh left her as she stood on her toes, reaching up even as he leaned down to accept her kiss.

"Aren't we all?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh aren't we all, indeed. Blame this song maybe- [Waiting for Love - Avicii](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ncIVUXZla8) Although maybe don't watch that video, Onions- my god the onions...
> 
> I hope this is a suitable end that isn't an end. I'm not sure if I'm happy with it, but every time I come back to it- it just gets longer, not better. But maybe it's in my head. My inside voice has been rather mean lately and it's likely to get worse before it gets better. So if you think I've fallen short with this chapter or the last, let me know, and I'll endeavor to fix it... _somehow_. 
> 
> I have yet to name the next part, but the first chapter's mostly done with editing (The adventures of Sparkles and Knives. No? _Okaaaay_.) I'll think of something I'm sure. It'll probably be up soonish, once I pick myself up out of this mental hole.
> 
> Do I need to translate this chapter? 
> 
> Ar lath ma, Emm'asha, ma Revas = I love you, my woman, my freedom.  
> La ar lath ma Abelas, ma vhenan'ara = And I love you 'Abelas', My heart's desire.
> 
> Did I just finish a thing?! Hell yes I did. Breakin' out the wine tonight!


End file.
